Tasty Tuesday

Ok, so I've been thinking about veganism for quite a long, long while. The idea came to me today to post about and ask for your favorite vegan things to eat. As I was thinking about that I turned on the Oprah episode I recorded today and it was all about veganism! I feel like vegan eating has been smacking me in the face for a very long time. Do you ever feel like the universe/God is beating you over the head with something that you conveniently choose to ignore?

To be clear, there are MANY messages God beats me over the head with. I'm choosing to focus on veganism today. And the message is much deeper than the food I'm putting in my mouth.

Why veganism for me? When I pay attention to where the meat I eat comes from I am repulsed. It's not worth it. Not only is it not necessary for my health, I truly believe it's detrimental. Why do I continue to eat meat. Selfish. Ego. Mindless behavior. That's the reason I participate in many, if not all, of my self destructive behaviors.

My initial thoughts about this post were to focus on vegan food that I, and/or you, truly enjoy. No one likes to eat something out of oblgation. I enjoy every bite of lightly steamed broccoli, seasoned with Bragg's Liquid Aminos, mixed with black beans and Seeds of Change Quinoa & Whole Grain Brown Rice w/garlic packet. I feel happy when I eat it. I don't feel deprived in the least. I love salad with Galeo's Miso Dijonnaise. I love guacamole with baked corn chips.

Please post about a vegan meal you love.

WTF Wednesday: My Strange Addiction

Ok, if you're having a bad day, feeling like a loser, feeling like you don't fit in or just simply feeling like other chicks don't quite understand your search for the perfect natural eye shadow palette, your excitement over holiday gift sets with super cool eyeliner and shadow flavors (that you gave to yourself) or the urge to rub Doritos & blue cheese all over your body then you should take the time to watch TLC's show My Strange Addiction. Is this show a big hoax? I'm wondering if they are just fucking with us. I keep looking over my shoulder thinking one of those Candid Cameras is secretly watching me and soon everyone will jump out and howl "Bwahahahahahahahah! You actually believed that shit?!"

I'm quite sure I can't do these freak show weirdos justice with my simple recounting of the show. I can't even believe they define these behaviors as an addiction. Drinking and drugging are addictions. Shopping and gambling. Addictions.

Excerpts from the show:

"My name is Adele. My addiction is eating couch cushions." She's been doing it for 20 years. She's had bowel obstructions. She thinks it's to the point she needs to seek therapy. After 20 years. She thinks her 'addiction' may have something to do with her parents getting a divorce when she was young. Her therapist suggests, with a straight face, that she may be "stuffing" her feelings down.




"My name is Lauren . My addiction is wearing fur suits." She has a 'fursona'. She jogs in her fur suit. She does just about everything in her fur suit. She got her boyfriend into it. He loves it. She doesn't think it's weird. She doesn't have sex in it. Yet. Yeah right. She thinks it might have something to do with her dad dying. Her mom thinks she should maybe see a therapist.

Really?? Oh my goodness gracious. I just don't even know what to say. To put it mildly, these people are just plain beyond fucked up.

Previews for tonight's show highlight a guy that "thinks it's just a matter of time before people start choosing a synthetic option." He's talking about for a girlfriend. For sex. Companionship. Yeeeaaahhhh. Don't cha think if men could have found a pussy that was worth it and didn't talk back they would all have it in the closet by now?? Or do they......??

Tasty Tuesday

With the Steelers going to the Super Bowl Baby it's time to think about party food. Super Bowl worthy food. Time to take it up a notch. My dear friend Kim has graciously decided to host a Super Bowl party. I voted to have a Qdoba taco bar to make things easy on her. I still can't help but think about what other cheesy, greasy items we might add to the menu.

No party is complete without some sort of ball shaped appetizer. Especially a Super Bowl party. Sausage balls anyone? I'm not sure if it would be worth it to take the time to shape these piglet nuggets into footballs or not. You could pipe the laces on with mustard?? Here's the basic recipe I found on many websites:

Ingredients:
1 pound ground pork sausage
2 cups biscuit baking mix
1 pound sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded

Directions
1.Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2.In a large bowl, combine sausage, biscuit baking mix and cheese. Form into walnut size balls and place on baking sheets.
3.Bake in preheated oven for 10 minutes, until golden brown.

Can you ever go wrong with a 1:1 ratio of sausage to cheese? I'm guessing you'd brown the sausage first?? Recipes don't say. Might be too dry tho if the sausage was cooked so it must be uncooked. Gross. I hate to handle raw sausage. I bet my mom has made these before. She'll let us know. I would be tempted to add some onion and garlic salt, maybe green chiles. Knowing me I'd find a way to sneak in some blue cheese too. I would definitely use Uncle Charley's spicy sausage as it is the bomdigity of sausage. Some kind of a mustard dipping sauce sounds delightful don't you think?

Paula Dean's Hot Spinach Artichoke Dip . I've always wanted to make this. Feb 6 just may be the lucky day.







Gotta have the football Oreos!










Football Meatloaf?! Hello??!! Maybe not for the party but I'm making it this week for the kids for sure! Although some mini buns with a sweet & spicy ketchuppy sauce could make a tasty football meatloaf slider. Hmmmmm.....











Incidentally, I'm watching the Biggest Loser as I type this post. Not quite sure how I feel about that. Mostly this show inspires me to snack as I'm not that fucking fat... yet. Then it makes me feel like a loser because if these chubbies can work out that hard and stick to their diets then I have no excuse whatsoever. Or do I.......

What's Up Homies??

I'm feelin' the urge to blog! Partly because my creative side has been lying (laying?) dormant for way too long. Partly because I have the urge to scream WTF???? Partly because I've had 3 glasses of wine.

I want to vent without being judged and without anyone taking it personally. Is that possible?? That sounds like nirvana to me. I have spent my entire life fearing the people I love will not like me if I spew what's in my head. Honestly, sometimes they don't. Is it possible to say what you think without anyone taking it personally?? Don't we all know by now that what we say has everything to do with us and nothing to do with YOU? Thus, the desire for an anonymous blog. Of course, that leaves those of you in my life wondering WTF do I want to say. Well, if I told you I'd have to kill you :-) Or vice versa.

I often feel like I'm walking through life smiling, hugging, air kissing, saying "How are you, I'm great! How are YOU?" over and over. I want to be real without complaining. Honestly, I don't have anything to complain about. I want other people to be real, but really real. Not stupid real. I want to be compassionate and empathetic. I also want to say "REALLY, STFU!" I am blessed to have friends & family in my life right now that are smart and honest. You know who you are :-)

I did a quick search for "mom blogs" for Chad today because he wants to target Qdoba advertising through social media to Pittsburgh moms. Free kid's meals on Sundays! Awesome! I was like, "I don't read Mom blogs" as if I was too school for cool. What I did find in my quick search was borrrringgg. I'm not an idiot. I know there are super cool, funny blogs out there. If you love one. Post it. Cuz I didn't find them in my quick search.

I have been searching for my passion for the last, say 39 years. I have yet to discover it. What have I discovered? I love to write. I love attention. I love to cook. I love my kids & my husband. I really think they are so much better than everyone else's. No offense. That has to be something genetic so that we don't kill our own. I must be doing something right because I know I have the best friends right now. I want to eat you all up!! It's true.

I have written many posts over the last few months, never finished or posted. This one is scattered and random, like many others. I might actually post this one. A step in the direction of creativity, honesty, acceptance....

Hiatus

It's obvious I haven't posted in awhile. I am officially taking an extended hiatus.....for many reasons. I won't say just yet that I'm done with this blog but that is what I'm thinking. I have all but three readers so it's not like this is earth shattering news or that I can't tell you myself next time I talk to you. But there it is. Sayonara for now, compadres!! It's been real.

Versatile Blogger

Connie, my mom, has awarded me this award:

To accept this award I have to:

* reveal 7 truths about myself
* select 7 blogs that I would like to share the award with

So here are my seven truths:

1. I like to swear. A lot. I always have and I don't know why, but I do. Besides the occasional outburst , I do a decent job of not swearing in front of my kids. As long as they don't fuck up we're in pretty good shape.

2. I am immensely blessed and eternally grateful for my healthy, beautiful family.

3. I am a procrastinator.

4. I never played sports but wished I had. I know, I know, it's never to late. STFU.

5. I love nifty electronic gadgets. iPad, iPod Touch, smart phones, etc. Unfortunately, they do not help with my procrastination issues.

6. I love realty tv. And my DVR.

7. I am not a good housekeeper. Probably because I spend too much time playing with my nifty electronic gadgets and watching tv :-)

7 Blogs I'd like to see participate:

Simple Living with a Dash of Chaos

Hmmm, I'm pretty much a blog stalker so I'm not sure I have seven to suggest. I'll go ahead and post and think on it.

Tasty Tuesday

I don't have a tasty recipe to post today but I do have a tease..... I bought Reese's peanut butter cups and Dove chocolate caramel squares today. I am going to shove both of these tasty nuggets in my gorgeous dark chocolate cupcake batter and see what happens. I have never tried this. I once tried putting a dollop of ganache on top of this batter before I baked it but it did not sink and thus did not bake well. I have another recipe that a dollop of ganache works very well with but the cupcake is ultimately not as good as my original recipe. My gut is that I should pipe in a caramel filling after the cupcake is baked because I am concerned about the caramel filling hardening after baking. I am going to try a few different methods while my dear sister-in-law is here to be a taste tester. I will post the results!!

Note: the Reese's peanut butter cup is just a basic chocolate & peanut butter combination that must be tried. The best chocolate cupcake with the perfect peanut butter inside sounds delightful. Will it bake up so? No idea.

Manic Monday

I just realized it was Monday! That's an extraordinary thing. This Monday was Not Manic. At all. Lucy and I went to see Nanny McPhee Returns. I saw the first one with the boys. She didn't. I didn't love that one but she was sure she would love this one so off we went. It was actually the first time she and I had gone to see a movie by ourselves, just the two of us. That was nice. We ate at the new Qdoba right next door after the movie. Yum. Very relaxing, uneventful day :-)

Funky Fresh Friday

I do realize that the themed, day of the week topics are a bit cheesy but it does motivate me to write so.....who cares. I could've done Fuck You Friday but I resisted. That would be soooooo unoriginal. I haven't said Fuck You to anyone [out loud] in a really long time. I've been having the urge to say it to my neighbor lately because he's a douche. I feel it a coming.

But, that's not the topic! I am more funky than fresh right now. I'll just let you wonder about that.

How cute is this website?? Love it! Funky and fresh! Carolyn's Kitchen

Love this apron! Pretty sure I don't need the garter. I definitely always wear clothes under my apron as well. Would not use the gloves but still think they're cute.

Note to men reading this blog.....no matter how cute & hip, I wouldn't buy this for your lady. If my mom or sister-in-law gave it to me, even with the garter, I would be amused and love it and think it was sooooooo cute. If my husband got it for me, especially with the garter, I'd think "WTF do you think I am? Some whore that cooks for you? What? I don't look good enough already while I cook all your meals and wash your clothes? I need to wear an apron with a fucking garter too?! Fuck You. I ain't cookin' no more. You go give this to your Chinese girlfriend with the small hands. I bet she'll wear it while she "give you happy ending". Then ask her for an egg roll because your missus said 'So solly Missa Brooks, I no cook tonight."

Just kidding. That was a joke, people. I crack myself up with my "Missa Brooks" routine. I don't think Chad thinks it's as funny. Don't make fun of people who speak broken English, he says. She's just trying to make a living. Whatever. I know he wishes most of half the time I didn't speak English. He'll never admit it, but I know. So solly, Missa Brooks, but you know me love you long time :-)

Dark Chocolate Salted Caramel Cupcakes

I have been dreaming and salivating for awhile over the thought of a Dark Chocolate Salted Caramel Cupcake. I made a devine, if I do say so myself, cookie by the same name for my 2009 holiday cookie exchange. It's been 90+ degrees all week. Too hot to bake. It's supposed to cool off this weekend and I am dying to try a new, self concocted recipe (the very best kind)! Stay stuned!!

I have a couple of good options for the chocalate cupcake part. I'll put a rolo in the middle. Certain recipes accept a dollop in the batter better than others. Another option is to pipe caramel filling into my normal dark chocolate cupcake. I would definitely like your thoughts on the frosting. I'll sprinkle/coat the frosting in a sugar/sea salt mixture like I did the cookie. Should the frosting be a typical chocolate buttercream? A richer chocolate ganache? A combination of chocolate, caramel buttercream? A chocolate buttercream with caramel drizzle and sugar/sea salt sprinkle? I'm leaning towards chocolate ganache with sugar/seat salt sprinkle. Although who can resist caramel drizzle. Hello! So many options. Please let me know what makes your mouth water. I am excited about this cupcake!

Why Didn't I Think of That Thursday?

Hmmmm.... I wanted to just do Tasty Tuesday a bit late but I've had this topic in mind so I wanted to come up with something. Plus, Chad's not home yet so I still have the laptop :-)

Confession time. The woman I most envy right now is The Pioneer Woman. I love her blog!! I admire her. I think she's funny. I think she's smart. I wonder why I didn't think of all that stuff that she does. I could have done that! Right? But I didn't. So, I feel like a loser. Don't tell Pioneer Woman. She would disapprove. I just want to get my shit together and do something!!! Ugh. What is my problem!!

WTF Wednesday

So, I've had a request from the people......WTF have you been doing for the past week? Why haven't you blogged? What happened to Tasty Tuesday? Why Didn't I Think of That Thursday? Fun Friday?

Well, I don't like blogging on my iPad. Besides the fact that I can't type at my normal lightening speed I can't figure out how to upload a darn picture! On my desktop I can save a picture and then easily upload it. On the iPad I can save a picture but can't figure out how to upload it to the blog. Drives me nuts.

Why can't I blog on my desktop, you may be thinking. Well, the desktop crashed a bajillion times. I'm sure if it wasn't completely fucked already I finished it off by repeatedly unplugging and restarting it. I moved on to the backup laptop but the keyboard was all jacked up and not working at all. Fucking kids. I took both computers, which are not old, to Kevin, the computer guy. I called to check on them today. He said they were both working perfectly for him! WTF???? He did witness the jacked upness of the laptop when I dropped it off so he doesn't think I'm crazy.

In the meantime I've been using Chad's brand new laptop when he's not looking. Shhhhhh. However, I've only been doing real important stuff like hockey manager spreadsheets, planning a pre-season hockey party for 50 people and organizing half-time oranges for football. Next week is the first general PTA meeting (for which I'm already VP) so someone better tie my hands to keep me from volunteering for more shit like homeroom mom, library, math & science fair........ I think I'm trying to prove that having kids hasn't turned me into the fucking retard I feel like half the time. I'm showing them alright. Whomever they are.

Manic Monday

Great day! Not manic at all. I bounded out of bed at 6am. I scooted those little goblins onto the bus for their first day of school and basked in a bicker-free environment for the rest of my day..... Not free of whining because I had Lucy but it was still music to my ears. I don't even think she realizes she's whining at this point. Whaaaaaattttteeeeeevvvverrrr!!

By the time the boys got off the bus I had baked brownies, bagel bites & pizza to welcome them home. They bounded off the bus with smiles. Hooray!!

Apparently Sam's teacher is the Goddess of all Children. She has 6 biological children, one with special needs and another that recently had a liver transplant. She's in the process of adopting two more with special needs. WELL......... I said, "Did you mention you had FOUR cavities and I dealt with it in stride! I had them filled right away! And with the white stuff, not the trashy silver stuff. Yeah! Did you put that in your "me bag" to take to school tomorrow?

I bet she had a crock pot going all day making pot roast or some shit. I've decided if I make brownies & pizza when they get home from school then that's their dinner! Seriously? I suggested Chad have a burrito. Duh.

Background

I've been trying many different backgrounds so please comment on whatever one you see. Like? Dislike? Distracting? Not me? Me? I don't feel like I've found the perfect one yet. Describe the one you're seeing since I'm changing it left and right.

Funday Sunday

Holy hell I am tired! I got up with Sam today at 6am for hockey and have been running ever since. Both boys had their first football game today. That was super fun to watch but also exhausting since that meant four straight hours of little people football. Just how many hours is one person supposed to be able to resist the concession stand walking taco or nachos grande?? I better get used to it because it runs until the end of October.

My belly laugh moment of the day came as Henry was filling out his 3rd grade paperwork during Sam's football game. When asked by his teacher "If I had a million dollars I would buy...", he responded, "I'd buy a new butt, cuz mine has a crack in it." I've been laughing ever since.

Birthday Cupcakes

I made two dozen of these for my friend's daughter that is turning 12. She's taking them for her soccer team whose colors are black & gold. They looked cuter in person. It's really hard to photograph food and make it look good.



These were the ones I made for her birthday last year that she also took for her soccer team.

WTF Wednesday

It's not quite midnight so it's not too late for WTF Wednesday. At the beginning of the day I had no idea if I would have anything to write about on this topic. Who the fuck was I kidding?

I don't normally get stressed out about stuff. I'm a pretty laid back chick if you know what I mean. And if you don't, I just mean I don't give a fuck about a lot of shit. It's late..... I think I may swear more late at night. I'm usually in bed by 10pm. It's 11:30pm. Why, you ask, am I up so late? Because at some point, some time I thought it would be a good idea to make cupcakes for money. Conclusion: I should only make cupcakes because I enjoy it. Not for the money.

I made these beauties for a friend of mines husband to take to work to thank somebody for something. They turned out pretty cute. This first picture was taken on my kitchen counter. Not the best background but I didn't have a plate big enough. By the way, why do children have the urge to fucking touch EVERYTHING!!!! When they were babies they touched things to learn. By now they should keep their grubby hands off my shit!! I digress....



This picture is in the cupcake carrier. You can see the colors a bit different. 12 vanilla. 6 chocolate. $40.


I haven't had a cupcake order in I have no idea how long. I still have 2 dozen cupcakes for someone else to decorate for tomorrow!! WTF was I thinking?? Not to mention, Sam's birthday party is tomorrow at Kennywood which means I have to get up early and frost these other cupcakes (picture tomorrow), go pick up bagels & donuts and get a bunch of jacked up kids ready to head to the amusement park by 10am. Smart planning.

Cupcakes are cooling. I just need to finish the frosting. It's the frosting that always pushes me over the edge. I hate making frosting.

And you know what? My kids never want cupcakes for their birthdays. And I never eat the cupcakes. By the time I'm done baking and frosting and saying ever so nicely that I DON'T NEED ANY FUCKING HELP, THANK YOU!!!! I'm tired of looking at cupcakes.

I have to say that when I turned up the music and let it drown out the children's cries for "help" (give me a break) the whole process was quite enjoyable. That and the wine.

Tasty Tuesday: Food I Can't Live Without

One of my favorite, semi-healthy, go-to meals right now is, let's call it, Sarah's Cobb Salad. I can assemble it in less than 5 minutes and I thoroughly enjoy every single bite. Oh so tasty and I feel no guilt because I love it so much. Worth every single calorie.

My most favorite ingredient that I start to panic a bit when I'm almost out of is Galeos Miso Dijonnaise. I love, love, LOVE this salad dressing!!! I would love it even if it were unhealthy but it's actually super healthy! Low calorie, low fat, low sugar, high flavor. Love it!! I can only buy it at Whole Foods which is a pain to get to so I sometimes just order it online so I don't have to go without.

My second favorite and absolutely necessary ingredient is blue (or gorgonzola) cheese. Sometimes I have a big tub from Sam's Club which is adequate but lately I've been splurging on smaller portions of better quality cheese. Totally worth it.

I always buy in bulk mixed greens, real bacon bits & ready to eat chicken strips from Sam's Club so I have never have an excuse for not eating a salad.

My favorite croutons are Rothbury Farms (Cheese Garlic). They have the perfect crunch and seasoning. Other croutons just aren't worth the calories.

If I'm really on the ball I'll have hard boiled eggs & avocado on hand. Bonus but not necessary for pure enjoyment of my salad.

What's your favorite food, meal or recipe this summer?

Manic Monday

So I made up a song and I can't get it out of my head. It goes a little somethin' like this....

SCHOOL STARTS IN 1 WEEK! OH YEAH, Baby!!

I have a little dance that goes with it. The kids think I'm weird. Whatever. Pesky fuckers.

Also part of my Manic Monday was allowing 2 boys to sleep over last night which meant I was yelling at four boys at 11pm instead of just my own two. I did that forgetting I had already invited another boy to come over this morning and play. And then I, of course, invited his sister to stay and play so Lucy wouldn't be the only girl and driving me bananas. That's 7 kids in case you lost count. It was fun. Lots of pancakes, bacon, Gatorade and an extra large pizza. The only time I had to yell was when someone threw an old bottle of Hawaiian Punch on Henry, covering him from head to toe in his white shorts. I let the two girls pee behind a tree at the private school park. That's not bad, right?

All is quiet for the next 10 minutes then it's time to get ready for football. After I drop them off I'm on to my first hockey manager meeting. Should be interesting. Hockey parents can be intense. I shall be a catalyst for calm.

Willie Nelson update

So, Willie was awesome. We got there a bit late because we figured the "family" might be playing so I think we missed some good Willie tunes. The sun was down and there were dark rain clouds overhead so it was comfortably warm. The concert was pretty basic as far as presentation (a huge Texas flag in the background), instruments & musicians which was quite refreshing during a time when so many things are too extravagant and over the top. I envy Willie and his family. They've obviously spent a lifetime following their passion. When will I discover mine?