WARNING: this is a long and rambling post. It may be one only a mother would want to read. Thanks in advance, Mom : )
I'm beat. It was really sunny and hot today which I know most people are loving but being in the sun just makes me tired and hot and stinky.
I took Henry, Lucy and a friend to a park this afternoon that has a great little creek. The creek is super shallow and it's hard for anyone to get into too much trouble. As usual, the boys went straight for it. Lucy then convinced me to roll up my jeans and walk with her through the middle of the creek. She was absolutely NOT going down the big slide but apparently uncharted water was not a problem. The water barely covered my feet most places so it was perfect. I really wanted it to be one of those days where I appreciated the cool water running over the rocks and felt grateful to be in the shade. I wanted to enjoy just BEING with my 2 yr old daughter who delights in just about everything. I did enjoy her and her delight but I was also a little edgy and ready to get the hell out of the dirty creek. I felt like I had an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. Eckhart Tolle would say the fact that I was aware of my ego means that I am growing spiritually. If you haven't read A New Earth then you may not know what I'm talking about. But trust me, I'm growing.
On another note. The Quantum Cleanse one. I am doing really well overall. I did have a moment of complete weakness last night when I was starving and my husband brought home a piping hot pepperoni pizza. My unconscious self took control and I furtively scarfed down a greasy, cheesy piece of animal produced goodness. I have to admit, it was really good. I quickly resumed control, did not eat another piece and vowed not to let it effect my day or my plan.
Today has been a day of vegan, gluten free leftovers so there is nothing new to report there. I have to say that it has been remarkably easy to stick to the vegan part of the cleanse, especially considering that I am not a person who normally eats many fruits and vegetables.
I have jumped on every Atkins, Nutri System, Weight Watchers, Tae Bo, Ab Roller bandwagon in the past with no long-term success. I realize 5 days does not constitute long-term success but I really think that the added aspect of being kinder to the earth and animals has made this 'bandwagon' easier. It has taken my whole concept of eating to another level that is not all about ME. I'm actually thinking about other things besides the size of my ass. Although, if this vegan thing doesn't doesn't make my ass just a little bit smaller I will be sorely disappointed. I don't think disappointed enough to go back to eating defenseless animals though.