Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Hollywood Exposed

Ok, so I was just going to get Botox and not talk about it. There are so many haters in my life. Jealous bitches. And I really just love to show up looking fabulous and pretend I don't hear the whispers as I enter the room.

It had been a while since I got it (the first time). I was nervous. I took a bunch of Advil to numb the pain. I neglected to remember that ibuprophen is a blood thinner so it makes you bruise easier. Dumbass.

Dr. Gonzales was the plastic surgeon administering the injections. I have to admit I felt special having a plastic surgeon paying attention to me but not suggesting I do anything more. Your tits are fabulous! How old are you? NO?! Really?

One of the first things he said was "It's like Rice Krispies, right?". I said, "Huh?" Apparently I missed that the first time around. He reminded me it sounds like Rice Krispies when you penetrate some particular layer of skin.

I squealed like a stuck pig after every injection. And, oddly enough, it did sound like Rice Krispies. Creeeeeepy. But cool. I love that kinda shit.

Another weird thing that I should probably not be sharing is the fact that I can wiggle my ears like crazy now. I have always had that particular talent. However, after exercising my brow muscles, as instructed, I found that since certain muscles were paralyzed others were working overtime. My ears. Sexy. No?

1 comment:

Connie said...

You're soon to become the mom who doesn't scowl but can wiggle her ears at you. Still can't believe you're doing that -- botox, I mean.