Sarah In Disturbia

Tasty Tuesday

2011-02-01T21:25:00.005-05:00

Ok, so I've been thinking about veganism for quite a long, long while. The idea came to me today to post about and ask for your favorite vegan things to eat. As I was thinking about that I turned on the Oprah episode I recorded today and it was all about veganism! I feel like vegan eating has been smacking me in the face for a very long time. Do you ever feel like the universe/God is beating you over the head with something that you conveniently choose to ignore?

To be clear, there are MANY messages God beats me over the head with. I'm choosing to focus on veganism today. And the message is much deeper than the food I'm putting in my mouth.

Why veganism for me? When I pay attention to where the meat I eat comes from I am repulsed. It's not worth it. Not only is it not necessary for my health, I truly believe it's detrimental. Why do I continue to eat meat. Selfish. Ego. Mindless behavior. That's the reason I participate in many, if not all, of my self destructive behaviors.

My initial thoughts about this post were to focus on vegan food that I, and/or you, truly enjoy. No one likes to eat something out of oblgation. I enjoy every bite of lightly steamed broccoli, seasoned with Bragg's Liquid Aminos, mixed with black beans and Seeds of Change Quinoa & Whole Grain Brown Rice w/garlic packet. I feel happy when I eat it. I don't feel deprived in the least. I love salad with Galeo's Miso Dijonnaise. I love guacamole with baked corn chips.

Please post about a vegan meal you love.

WTF Wednesday: My Strange Addiction

2011-01-26T10:18:00.001-05:00

Ok, if you're having a bad day, feeling like a loser, feeling like you don't fit in or just simply feeling like other chicks don't quite understand your search for the perfect natural eye shadow palette, your excitement over holiday gift sets with super cool eyeliner and shadow flavors (that you gave to yourself) or the urge to rub Doritos & blue cheese all over your body then you should take the time to watch TLC's show My Strange Addiction. Is this show a big hoax? I'm wondering if they are just fucking with us. I keep looking over my shoulder thinking one of those Candid Cameras is secretly watching me and soon everyone will jump out and howl "Bwahahahahahahahah! You actually believed that shit?!"

I'm quite sure I can't do these freak show weirdos justice with my simple recounting of the show. I can't even believe they define these behaviors as an addiction. Drinking and drugging are addictions. Shopping and gambling. Addictions.

Excerpts from the show:

"My name is Adele. My addiction is eating couch cushions." She's been doing it for 20 years. She's had bowel obstructions. She thinks it's to the point she needs to seek therapy. After 20 years. She thinks her 'addiction' may have something to do with her parents getting a divorce when she was young. Her therapist suggests, with a straight face, that she may be "stuffing" her feelings down.

"My name is Lauren . My addiction is wearing fur suits." She has a 'fursona'. She jogs in her fur suit. She does just about everything in her fur suit. She got her boyfriend into it. He loves it. She doesn't think it's weird. She doesn't have sex in it. Yet. Yeah right. She thinks it might have something to do with her dad dying. Her mom thinks she should maybe see a therapist.

Really?? Oh my goodness gracious. I just don't even know what to say. To put it mildly, these people are just plain beyond fucked up.

Previews for tonight's show highlight a guy that "thinks it's just a matter of time before people start choosing a synthetic option." He's talking about for a girlfriend. For sex. Companionship. Yeeeaaahhhh. Don't cha think if men could have found a pussy that was worth it and didn't talk back they would all have it in the closet by now?? Or do they......??

Tasty Tuesday

2011-01-25T20:39:00.013-05:00

With the Steelers going to the Super Bowl Baby it's time to think about party food. Super Bowl worthy food. Time to take it up a notch. My dear friend Kim has graciously decided to host a Super Bowl party. I voted to have a Qdoba taco bar to make things easy on her. I still can't help but think about what other cheesy, greasy items we might add to the menu.

No party is complete without some sort of ball shaped appetizer. Especially a Super Bowl party. Sausage balls anyone? I'm not sure if it would be worth it to take the time to shape these piglet nuggets into footballs or not. You could pipe the laces on with mustard?? Here's the basic recipe I found on many websites:

Ingredients:
1 pound ground pork sausage
2 cups biscuit baking mix
1 pound sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded

Directions
1.Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2.In a large bowl, combine sausage, biscuit baking mix and cheese. Form into walnut size balls and place on baking sheets.
3.Bake in preheated oven for 10 minutes, until golden brown.

Can you ever go wrong with a 1:1 ratio of sausage to cheese? I'm guessing you'd brown the sausage first?? Recipes don't say. Might be too dry tho if the sausage was cooked so it must be uncooked. Gross. I hate to handle raw sausage. I bet my mom has made these before. She'll let us know. I would be tempted to add some onion and garlic salt, maybe green chiles. Knowing me I'd find a way to sneak in some blue cheese too. I would definitely use Uncle Charley's spicy sausage as it is the bomdigity of sausage. Some kind of a mustard dipping sauce sounds delightful don't you think?

Paula Dean's Hot Spinach Artichoke Dip . I've always wanted to make this. Feb 6 just may be the lucky day.

Gotta have the football Oreos!

Football Meatloaf?! Hello??!! Maybe not for the party but I'm making it this week for the kids for sure! Although some mini buns with a sweet & spicy ketchuppy sauce could make a tasty football meatloaf slider. Hmmmmm.....

Incidentally, I'm watching the Biggest Loser as I type this post. Not quite sure how I feel about that. Mostly this show inspires me to snack as I'm not that fucking fat... yet. Then it makes me feel like a loser because if these chubbies can work out that hard and stick to their diets then I have no excuse whatsoever. Or do I.......

What's Up Homies??

2011-01-24T22:14:00.002-05:00

I'm feelin' the urge to blog! Partly because my creative side has been lying (laying?) dormant for way too long. Partly because I have the urge to scream WTF???? Partly because I've had 3 glasses of wine.

I want to vent without being judged and without anyone taking it personally. Is that possible?? That sounds like nirvana to me. I have spent my entire life fearing the people I love will not like me if I spew what's in my head. Honestly, sometimes they don't. Is it possible to say what you think without anyone taking it personally?? Don't we all know by now that what we say has everything to do with us and nothing to do with YOU? Thus, the desire for an anonymous blog. Of course, that leaves those of you in my life wondering WTF do I want to say. Well, if I told you I'd have to kill you :-) Or vice versa.

I often feel like I'm walking through life smiling, hugging, air kissing, saying "How are you, I'm great! How are YOU?" over and over. I want to be real without complaining. Honestly, I don't have anything to complain about. I want other people to be real, but really real. Not stupid real. I want to be compassionate and empathetic. I also want to say "REALLY, STFU!" I am blessed to have friends & family in my life right now that are smart and honest. You know who you are :-)

I did a quick search for "mom blogs" for Chad today because he wants to target Qdoba advertising through social media to Pittsburgh moms. Free kid's meals on Sundays! Awesome! I was like, "I don't read Mom blogs" as if I was too school for cool. What I did find in my quick search was borrrringgg. I'm not an idiot. I know there are super cool, funny blogs out there. If you love one. Post it. Cuz I didn't find them in my quick search.

I have been searching for my passion for the last, say 39 years. I have yet to discover it. What have I discovered? I love to write. I love attention. I love to cook. I love my kids & my husband. I really think they are so much better than everyone else's. No offense. That has to be something genetic so that we don't kill our own. I must be doing something right because I know I have the best friends right now. I want to eat you all up!! It's true.

I have written many posts over the last few months, never finished or posted. This one is scattered and random, like many others. I might actually post this one. A step in the direction of creativity, honesty, acceptance....

Hiatus

2010-12-12T19:49:00.003-05:00

It's obvious I haven't posted in awhile. I am officially taking an extended hiatus.....for many reasons. I won't say just yet that I'm done with this blog but that is what I'm thinking. I have all but three readers so it's not like this is earth shattering news or that I can't tell you myself next time I talk to you. But there it is. Sayonara for now, compadres!! It's been real.

Versatile Blogger

2010-09-27T06:45:00.004-04:00

Connie, my mom, has awarded me this award:

To accept this award I have to:

* reveal 7 truths about myself
* select 7 blogs that I would like to share the award with

So here are my seven truths:

1. I like to swear. A lot. I always have and I don't know why, but I do. Besides the occasional outburst , I do a decent job of not swearing in front of my kids. As long as they don't fuck up we're in pretty good shape.

2. I am immensely blessed and eternally grateful for my healthy, beautiful family.

3. I am a procrastinator.

4. I never played sports but wished I had. I know, I know, it's never to late. STFU.

5. I love nifty electronic gadgets. iPad, iPod Touch, smart phones, etc. Unfortunately, they do not help with my procrastination issues.

6. I love realty tv. And my DVR.

7. I am not a good housekeeper. Probably because I spend too much time playing with my nifty electronic gadgets and watching tv :-)

7 Blogs I'd like to see participate:

Simple Living with a Dash of Chaos

Hmmm, I'm pretty much a blog stalker so I'm not sure I have seven to suggest. I'll go ahead and post and think on it.

Tasty Tuesday

2010-09-06T22:02:00.002-04:00

I don't have a tasty recipe to post today but I do have a tease..... I bought Reese's peanut butter cups and Dove chocolate caramel squares today. I am going to shove both of these tasty nuggets in my gorgeous dark chocolate cupcake batter and see what happens. I have never tried this. I once tried putting a dollop of ganache on top of this batter before I baked it but it did not sink and thus did not bake well. I have another recipe that a dollop of ganache works very well with but the cupcake is ultimately not as good as my original recipe. My gut is that I should pipe in a caramel filling after the cupcake is baked because I am concerned about the caramel filling hardening after baking. I am going to try a few different methods while my dear sister-in-law is here to be a taste tester. I will post the results!!

Note: the Reese's peanut butter cup is just a basic chocolate & peanut butter combination that must be tried. The best chocolate cupcake with the perfect peanut butter inside sounds delightful. Will it bake up so? No idea.

Manic Monday

2010-09-06T21:47:00.003-04:00

I just realized it was Monday! That's an extraordinary thing. This Monday was Not Manic. At all. Lucy and I went to see Nanny McPhee Returns. I saw the first one with the boys. She didn't. I didn't love that one but she was sure she would love this one so off we went. It was actually the first time she and I had gone to see a movie by ourselves, just the two of us. That was nice. We ate at the new Qdoba right next door after the movie. Yum. Very relaxing, uneventful day :-)

Funky Fresh Friday

2010-09-03T19:47:00.015-04:00

I do realize that the themed, day of the week topics are a bit cheesy but it does motivate me to write so.....who cares. I could've done Fuck You Friday but I resisted. That would be soooooo unoriginal. I haven't said Fuck You to anyone [out loud] in a really long time. I've been having the urge to say it to my neighbor lately because he's a douche. I feel it a coming.

But, that's not the topic! I am more funky than fresh right now. I'll just let you wonder about that.

How cute is this website?? Love it! Funky and fresh! Carolyn's Kitchen

Love this apron! Pretty sure I don't need the garter. I definitely always wear clothes under my apron as well. Would not use the gloves but still think they're cute.

Note to men reading this blog.....no matter how cute & hip, I wouldn't buy this for your lady. If my mom or sister-in-law gave it to me, even with the garter, I would be amused and love it and think it was sooooooo cute. If my husband got it for me, especially with the garter, I'd think "WTF do you think I am? Some whore that cooks for you? What? I don't look good enough already while I cook all your meals and wash your clothes? I need to wear an apron with a fucking garter too?! Fuck You. I ain't cookin' no more. You go give this to your Chinese girlfriend with the small hands. I bet she'll wear it while she "give you happy ending". Then ask her for an egg roll because your missus said 'So solly Missa Brooks, I no cook tonight."

Just kidding. That was a joke, people. I crack myself up with my "Missa Brooks" routine. I don't think Chad thinks it's as funny. Don't make fun of people who speak broken English, he says. She's just trying to make a living. Whatever. I know he wishes ~~most of~~ half the time I didn't speak English. He'll never admit it, but I know. So solly, Missa Brooks, but you know me love you long time :-)

Dark Chocolate Salted Caramel Cupcakes

2010-09-02T19:34:00.009-04:00

I have been dreaming and salivating for awhile over the thought of a Dark Chocolate Salted Caramel Cupcake. I made a devine, if I do say so myself, cookie by the same name for my 2009 holiday cookie exchange. It's been 90+ degrees all week. Too hot to bake. It's supposed to cool off this weekend and I am dying to try a new, self concocted recipe (the very best kind)! Stay stuned!!

I have a couple of good options for the chocalate cupcake part. I'll put a rolo in the middle. Certain recipes accept a dollop in the batter better than others. Another option is to pipe caramel filling into my normal dark chocolate cupcake. I would definitely like your thoughts on the frosting. I'll sprinkle/coat the frosting in a sugar/sea salt mixture like I did the cookie. Should the frosting be a typical chocolate buttercream? A richer chocolate ganache? A combination of chocolate, caramel buttercream? A chocolate buttercream with caramel drizzle and sugar/sea salt sprinkle? I'm leaning towards chocolate ganache with sugar/seat salt sprinkle. Although who can resist caramel drizzle. Hello! So many options. Please let me know what makes your mouth water. I am excited about this cupcake!

Why Didn't I Think of That Thursday?

2010-09-02T19:13:00.006-04:00

Hmmmm.... I wanted to just do Tasty Tuesday a bit late but I've had this topic in mind so I wanted to come up with something. Plus, Chad's not home yet so I still have the laptop :-)

Confession time. The woman I most envy right now is The Pioneer Woman. I love her blog!! I admire her. I think she's funny. I think she's smart. I wonder why I didn't think of all that stuff that she does. I could have done that! Right? But I didn't. So, I feel like a loser. Don't tell Pioneer Woman. She would disapprove. I just want to get my shit together and do something!!! Ugh. What is my problem!!

WTF Wednesday

2010-09-01T19:44:00.004-04:00

So, I've had a request from the people......WTF have you been doing for the past week? Why haven't you blogged? What happened to Tasty Tuesday? Why Didn't I Think of That Thursday? Fun Friday?

Well, I don't like blogging on my iPad. Besides the fact that I can't type at my normal lightening speed I can't figure out how to upload a darn picture! On my desktop I can save a picture and then easily upload it. On the iPad I can save a picture but can't figure out how to upload it to the blog. Drives me nuts.

Why can't I blog on my desktop, you may be thinking. Well, the desktop crashed a bajillion times. I'm sure if it wasn't completely fucked already I finished it off by repeatedly unplugging and restarting it. I moved on to the backup laptop but the keyboard was all jacked up and not working at all. Fucking kids. I took both computers, which are not old, to Kevin, the computer guy. I called to check on them today. He said they were both working perfectly for him! WTF???? He did witness the jacked upness of the laptop when I dropped it off so he doesn't think I'm crazy.

In the meantime I've been using Chad's brand new laptop when he's not looking. Shhhhhh. However, I've only been doing real important stuff like hockey manager spreadsheets, planning a pre-season hockey party for 50 people and organizing half-time oranges for football. Next week is the first general PTA meeting (for which I'm already VP) so someone better tie my hands to keep me from volunteering for more shit like homeroom mom, library, math & science fair........ I think I'm trying to prove that having kids hasn't turned me into the fucking retard I feel like half the time. I'm showing them alright. Whomever they are.

Manic Monday

2010-08-23T21:38:00.004-04:00

Great day! Not manic at all. I bounded out of bed at 6am. I scooted those little goblins onto the bus for their first day of school and basked in a bicker-free environment for the rest of my day..... Not free of whining because I had Lucy but it was still music to my ears. I don't even think she realizes she's whining at this point. Whaaaaaattttteeeeeevvvverrrr!!

By the time the boys got off the bus I had baked brownies, bagel bites & pizza to welcome them home. They bounded off the bus with smiles. Hooray!!

Apparently Sam's teacher is the Goddess of all Children. She has 6 biological children, one with special needs and another that recently had a liver transplant. She's in the process of adopting two more with special needs. WELL......... I said, "Did you mention you had FOUR cavities and I dealt with it in stride! I had them filled right away! And with the white stuff, not the trashy silver stuff. Yeah! Did you put that in your "me bag" to take to school tomorrow?

I bet she had a crock pot going all day making pot roast or some shit. I've decided if I make brownies & pizza when they get home from school then that's their dinner! Seriously? I suggested Chad have a burrito. Duh.

Background

2010-08-23T21:33:00.002-04:00

I've been trying many different backgrounds so please comment on whatever one you see. Like? Dislike? Distracting? Not me? Me? I don't feel like I've found the perfect one yet. Describe the one you're seeing since I'm changing it left and right.

Funday Sunday

2010-08-22T19:00:00.004-04:00

Holy hell I am tired! I got up with Sam today at 6am for hockey and have been running ever since. Both boys had their first football game today. That was super fun to watch but also exhausting since that meant four straight hours of little people football. Just how many hours is one person supposed to be able to resist the concession stand walking taco or nachos grande?? I better get used to it because it runs until the end of October.

My belly laugh moment of the day came as Henry was filling out his 3rd grade paperwork during Sam's football game. When asked by his teacher "If I had a million dollars I would buy...", he responded, "I'd buy a new butt, cuz mine has a crack in it." I've been laughing ever since.

Birthday Cupcakes

2010-08-19T10:28:00.003-04:00

I made two dozen of these for my friend's daughter that is turning 12. She's taking them for her soccer team whose colors are black & gold. They looked cuter in person. It's really hard to photograph food and make it look good.

These were the ones I made for her birthday last year that she also took for her soccer team.

WTF Wednesday

2010-08-18T23:55:00.000-04:00

It's not quite midnight so it's not too late for WTF Wednesday. At the beginning of the day I had no idea if I would have anything to write about on this topic. Who the fuck was I kidding?

I don't normally get stressed out about stuff. I'm a pretty laid back chick if you know what I mean. And if you don't, I just mean I don't give a fuck about a lot of shit. It's late..... I think I may swear more late at night. I'm usually in bed by 10pm. It's 11:30pm. Why, you ask, am I up so late? Because at some point, some time I thought it would be a good idea to make cupcakes for money. Conclusion: I should only make cupcakes because I enjoy it. Not for the money.

I made these beauties for a friend of mines husband to take to work to thank somebody for something. They turned out pretty cute. This first picture was taken on my kitchen counter. Not the best background but I didn't have a plate big enough. By the way, why do children have the urge to fucking touch EVERYTHING!!!! When they were babies they touched things to learn. By now they should keep their grubby hands off my shit!! I digress....

This picture is in the cupcake carrier. You can see the colors a bit different. 12 vanilla. 6 chocolate. $40.

I haven't had a cupcake order in I have no idea how long. I still have 2 dozen cupcakes for someone else to decorate for tomorrow!! WTF was I thinking?? Not to mention, Sam's birthday party is tomorrow at Kennywood which means I have to get up early and frost these other cupcakes (picture tomorrow), go pick up bagels & donuts and get a bunch of jacked up kids ready to head to the amusement park by 10am. Smart planning.

Cupcakes are cooling. I just need to finish the frosting. It's the frosting that always pushes me over the edge. I hate making frosting.

And you know what? My kids never want cupcakes for their birthdays. And I never eat the cupcakes. By the time I'm done baking and frosting and saying ever so nicely that I DON'T NEED ANY FUCKING HELP, THANK YOU!!!! I'm tired of looking at cupcakes.

I have to say that when I turned up the music and let it drown out the children's cries for "help" (give me a break) the whole process was quite enjoyable. That and the wine.

Tasty Tuesday: Food I Can't Live Without

2010-08-17T07:27:00.001-04:00

One of my favorite, semi-healthy, go-to meals right now is, let's call it, Sarah's Cobb Salad. I can assemble it in less than 5 minutes and I thoroughly enjoy every single bite. Oh so tasty and I feel no guilt because I love it so much. Worth every single calorie.

My most favorite ingredient that I start to panic a bit when I'm almost out of is Galeos Miso Dijonnaise. I love, love, LOVE this salad dressing!!! I would love it even if it were unhealthy but it's actually super healthy! Low calorie, low fat, low sugar, high flavor. Love it!! I can only buy it at Whole Foods which is a pain to get to so I sometimes just order it online so I don't have to go without.

My second favorite and absolutely necessary ingredient is blue (or gorgonzola) cheese. Sometimes I have a big tub from Sam's Club which is adequate but lately I've been splurging on smaller portions of better quality cheese. Totally worth it.

I always buy in bulk mixed greens, real bacon bits & ready to eat chicken strips from Sam's Club so I have never have an excuse for not eating a salad.

My favorite croutons are Rothbury Farms (Cheese Garlic). They have the perfect crunch and seasoning. Other croutons just aren't worth the calories.

If I'm really on the ball I'll have hard boiled eggs & avocado on hand. Bonus but not necessary for pure enjoyment of my salad.

What's your favorite food, meal or recipe this summer?

Manic Monday

2010-08-15T21:34:00.008-04:00

So I made up a song and I can't get it out of my head. It goes a little somethin' like this....

SCHOOL STARTS IN 1 WEEK! OH YEAH, Baby!!

I have a little dance that goes with it. The kids think I'm weird. Whatever. Pesky fuckers.

Also part of my Manic Monday was allowing 2 boys to sleep over last night which meant I was yelling at four boys at 11pm instead of just my own two. I did that forgetting I had already invited another boy to come over this morning and play. And then I, of course, invited his sister to stay and play so Lucy wouldn't be the only girl and driving me bananas. That's 7 kids in case you lost count. It was fun. Lots of pancakes, bacon, Gatorade and an extra large pizza. The only time I had to yell was when someone threw an old bottle of Hawaiian Punch on Henry, covering him from head to toe in his white shorts. I let the two girls pee behind a tree at the private school park. That's not bad, right?

All is quiet for the next 10 minutes then it's time to get ready for football. After I drop them off I'm on to my first hockey manager meeting. Should be interesting. Hockey parents can be intense. I shall be a catalyst for calm.

Willie Nelson update

2010-08-15T07:33:00.002-04:00

So, Willie was awesome. We got there a bit late because we figured the "family" might be playing so I think we missed some good Willie tunes. The sun was down and there were dark rain clouds overhead so it was comfortably warm. The concert was pretty basic as far as presentation (a huge Texas flag in the background), instruments & musicians which was quite refreshing during a time when so many things are too extravagant and over the top. I envy Willie and his family. They've obviously spent a lifetime following their passion. When will I discover mine?

Willie Nelson & Family Live in Concert

2010-08-14T17:04:00.004-04:00

This is what we have planned for the evening. Not sure if I'm a fan of Willie's family or not but I'm guessing at his age he needs all the help he can get.

I've only been to a handful of concerts in my lifetime. My first concert was as a teenager. Def Leppard. I will never forget that one because I wore a homemade, tie dyed dress made out of an XL men's white t-shirt. It was a super hot Oklahoma summer night and Def Leppard was kind enough to hose down all of us screaming teenage girls. As a result, I ended up in a very sheer men's white t-shirt that dyed my underwear the same color as the tie dye. ClassssEY

Other concerts? MC Hammer maybe in college. Or somebody like that. George Straight here in Pittsburgh. Poison here in Pittsburgh. That was fun. I know there are a few others I can't remember right now. Not so memorable I guess. Ok, I'm boring myself.

I am looking forward to tonight's concert as long as it cools off. It's 92 degrees right now and everyone who knows me knows that I won't last more than 5 minutes in heat like that. Cross your fingers. What are the chances I get offered a joint at this concert? Hmmmmm....

Oh, and I meant cross your fingers about the weather not the joint.

I'm Back. Really.

2010-08-14T15:04:00.003-04:00

Wholey Moley it's been a long time since I've blogged!! I have missed it. I have actually started many a post over the summer and then abandoned them because either I got interrupted or decided it was going nowhere. I got an ipad for my birthday and that made it it harder to blog because I can't really type fast on it and I don't end up spending much time on a real keyboard because I'm ~~playing games~~ checking email, reading important stuff, etc. on the ipad instead of a PC. And then it had been so long I thought I should have something really important to say once I posted again. But I never really did. And I really want to monetize my blog but the fucking AdSense thing keeps telling me I already have an account but never lets me set up anything. Enough with the excuses. Just as summer ends and another school year begins I am back to tantalize you with the fascinating details of my life. Men will want me. Women will want to be me. Stay tuned.

I'm thinking of having certain topics on specific days of the week to motivate me to write. Like "Tantalize me Tuesday", "Wordless Wednesday" .... things like that. Any ideas from my two loyal readers?

First Official Day of Summer Break

2010-06-14T07:23:00.004-04:00

The boys' last day of school was Friday. It was only a half day and they just cleaned out desks and lockers so I'm sure, in their minds, that was the first official day of summer vacation. In my mind it was the last official day of freedom as I knew it. Not necessarily a bad thing; I just have to adjust my schedule and expectations.

Today is Monday, which in my mind is when summer break begins. No waking kids up for school or hounding them to stay off the computer and eat their breakfast. No rushing to finish homework that was forgotten the night before. No frantic searches for missing shoes because it's a gym day and all we can find are Crocs. No stern reminders that they'll have to walk to school if they miss the bus. [Come to think of it, I never actually followed through on that threat. I'll have to come up with something better in the fall.]

Instead it's nearly 8am and Sam is still sleeping. Henry is up but quietly reading a book on the couch with the dogs. Lucy is still sleeping as well because she can't seem to go to sleep at a decent hour with these long summer days. I'll have time to cook the extra thick bacon instead of the precooked microwave kind. We can all stay in our pajamas until at least 10am. We'll start packing for our road trip to Myrtle Beach. Only two more sleeps until we leave!!

Will I be able to get everyone out of the house with no complaining so I can run errands? Possibly. If I bribe them with toys for the upcoming road trip. Will I be asked 67 times if we can go to the pool today? Probably. Will I take them? Probably not. Will we all enjoy the first Monday of summer break? Most definitely.

It's Been Way Too Long!

2010-02-28T19:53:00.005-05:00

I can't believe it's been more than one month since I've blogged!

I did, by the way, include bee pollen in a few bowls of oatmeal. I felt extremely itchy/hivey afterwards but I am not convinced it was due to the bee pollen. I also started taking these detox supplements at the same time. Unfortunately, you have to actually eat ultra healthy while taking all those supplements and I just wasn't into it 100% of my days. Healthy oatmeal, YEAH! Blah, blah, blah.

So I stopped taking the supplements. I am going to give the bee pollen a shot again soon when it is the only new thing introduced.

My mom was tagged recently on her blog to list 10 things she loves. She chose not to tag others but I thought I would play along as it is a good topic to get started blogging again.

10 Things I Love

1. My hard working, handsome husband. I love him!!!

2. My beautiful children

3. My wonderful mom who just moved here to spend more time with us!

4. When it's NOT a fucking, pussy snow day.

5. Goat cheese

6. Wine

7. My gorgeous soul mate, Jessica

8. My amazing, inspiring, sister Juleah

9. Getting my nails done every two weeks

10. Long, Uninterrupted hot showers.

Bee Pollen??

2010-01-27T17:20:00.005-05:00

Apparently I've been living under a rock because I just read that bee pollen is one of nature’s healthiest and most powerful “superfoods”!! It’s been used as a dietary supplement for thousands of years. The early Egyptian and early Chinese civilizations both used it as a physical rejuvenator and medicine. The Greek physician Hippocrates, recognized as the father of modern medicine, used pollen as a healing substance over 2,500 years ago. Today natural health practitioners often refer to bee pollen as an herbal “fountain of youth” that can be used for everything from weight loss to cancer prevention. It may be nature's most perfect food...

Bee pollen has been shown to help people:

Lose weight
Increase energy, vitality and stamina
Enhance the immune system
Relieve allergy and asthma symptoms
Improve sexual function
Correct digestion problems
Slow the aging process

One thing is certain (according to bee-pollen-health.com): people who consume high-quality bee pollen almost always experience an increase in energy, zest, and physical endurance. This is precisely why thousands of world-class athletes supplement their diets with this natural substance.

What’s in Bee Pollen?
Bee pollen contains an incredible array of vitamins, minerals, amino acids, enzymes, co-enzymes, and hormones. It is especially rich in B vitamins and antioxidants, including lycopene, selenium, beta carotene, vitamin C, vitamin E, and several flavanoids. It is composed of 55% carbohydrates, 35% protein, 3% vitamins and minerals, 2% fatty acids, and 5% other substances. Overall, it's one of the most nutritionally complete natural substances found on earth. Who knew???

Well, buckle the fuck up, cuz guess who bought some bee pollen today??!! Yep, you got it. Yours truly!! I'm puttin' it in my oatmeal tomorrow morning!

Woo Hoo!! Yaya's Coming to Town!!

2010-01-25T17:23:00.007-05:00

I was going to call or email Yaya with a little tidbit that warmed my heart today but thought I'd like to share with a few more. It's the little things after all . . . .

First, a little background. I never had a super close relationship with my grandparents. I have a few random, yet vivid memories. They were amazing people, I cried when they died but I didn't mourn the "relationship". You know what I'm saying?

Chad's mom was the MOST amazing Mom and Memaw. Even though we lived far away she always made sure she saw us at least every 3 months. To say she was loving and generous is to put it mildly. It is truly tragic she left this earth so early. I sincerely mourn my relationship with her that was cut so short. Even more deeply, I mourn the fact that Sharon will not see her grandchildren grow up and they will not truly appreciate the person she was. I am extremely grateful for the time we did get to spend with her but it wasn't enough!

And so here we are. January 2010. My mom (Yaya) has made the HUGE decision to keep her wonderful home and darling husband in Tulsa AND rent an apartment here in Sewickley for 6 months so she can test the retirement waters and be close to her one and only (biological - which trumps the rest of you btw) fabulous child and three wonderful grandchildren. In Lucy's words, we are Super DUPER excited!!

I'm finally getting to the heart warming tidbit . . . When Henry got off the bus this afternoon he was carrying one of his favorite stuffed animals. How sweet is it that he still takes stuffed animals to school?! Anyway, the first thing he said was, "When is Yaya getting here?" He then proceeded to turn his little dog upside down to show me the tiny hole in it's belly. He then told me he had a couple of things that needed fixed. Lucy has a couple things lined up too.

I LOVE that they think of Yaya when one of their prized possessions is wounded. I think they will forever remember her as being the only one that can "fix" those things. Daddy can fix just about anything under the sun. But he doesn't sew. Mama is good for cooking, cleaning and cuddling when you are hurt or sad (as long as it doesn't drag the fuck on). But unless dollies and stuffed animals can be fixed with super glue or tape then Mama is worthless. Enter Yaya.

There are probably many aspects of their relationship with Yaya that we adults don't even realize are important. Yaya definitely knows kids speak up at the most unexpected moments with the most unexpected things. I am thrilled beyond words that she will be able to experience many more of those moments!

So, Mom and Tom, I know this change is BIG. I realize the sacrifice is HUGE for both of you. I am deeply grateful you two are open and willing to take on the challenge! Thank you, Tom, for understanding and sharing her with us! Regardless of things bought, moved and left behind I truly believe that it's the little unexpected moments that will make it all worthwhile.

Most Popular Passwords

2010-01-22T07:49:00.003-05:00

According to a new analysis, one out of five Web users still decides to leave the digital equivalent of a key under the doormat: they choose a simple, easily guessed password like "abc123," "iloveyou" or even "password" to protect their data.

"I guess it's just a genetic flaw in humans," said Amichai Shulman, the chief technology officer at Imperva, which makes software for blocking hackers. "We've been following the same patterns since the 1990s."

A genetic flaw??? I guess that's a nice way of saying at least 20% of Americans are dumber than a fucking rock.

For entire article go HERE.

Brown 52%, Coakley 47%

2010-01-20T09:03:00.002-05:00

From bostonherald.com: Demoralized Democrats were left grappling with the notion of a once-obscure GOP insurgent snatching the late Sen. Edward M. Kennedy’s seat in the so-called bluest state, only to possibly seal the demise of the late senator’s health-care dream - and single-handedly knock President Obama’s agenda off course.

From Sarah Brooks: Woo Hoo!!!!! All that keeps running through my head when I think of Obama is the following quote from the movie The Hangover.

Movie Review: Book of Eli

2010-01-18T08:51:00.009-05:00

5 Word Review: I Fucking Hated This Movie.

OK, so to be fair, this is not the type of movie I would normally watch in the first place. This was the plot summary I found online, "In the not-too-distant future, across the wasteland of what was once America, a lone warrior must fight to bring civilization the knowledge that could be the key to its redemption." After reading that I didn't want to watch it in the theater, at home, with a gun to my head . . .

But, I really [REALLY] wanted to get out of the house with two of my girlfriends and this was the only movie that fit into our timeline. They wanted to see it and, believe it or not, they loved it! They really, really did. So, this is just one fabulous person's opinion.

My one friend loves Denzel and, as a devout Christian, loved the message. Spoiler Alert! Don't read any further if you don't want to discover the "knowledge" referenced above.

By the end of the movie it is revealed that The Book of Eli is the last remaining King James Bible. Denzel (Eli) has been protected by God for the last 30 years as he's traveled through an America devastated by war, poverty and depravity because God spoke to him telling him to take the Book to "the West". There is a tremendous amount of violence and it is clear that cannibalism as a means of survival is commonplace. You can identify those who've eaten too much human meat by how much their hands shake.

Long, inane, unbelievable story short, Denzel has to give up THE BOOK towards the end to the one other person in the movie, i.e. THE bad guy, that realizes the importance of the Bible. Yet Denzel keeps travelling West, as he has been for the last 30 years. Everyone's wondering WTF . . . did he give the bad guy the REAL book (by this time everyone assumes its the Bible but it hasn't been confirmed) or does he have it hidden on his body somewhere?

Denzel (Eli) finally makes it to San Francisco where, apparently, the last civilized, intelligent people live. He tells them he has the last remaining King James Bible. Ta Daaaa!! They are astounded and grateful. At the same time the bad guy is opening up what he thinks is the Bible he stole from Denzel. It is then revealed . . . . that the bad guy DOES have the bible BUT . . . . It's all in BRAILLE!!!! Mooootheeeerfuuuucker!!!! He doesn't really say that but you know that's what he's thinking. The girlfriend he's been extremely horrid to throughout the movie just happens to be BLIND (pieces are falling into place) but she gives him a big FUCK YOU and says she doesn't remember braille. Touche!!

At the same time it is revealed that Denzel (Eli) is, yep, you got it, BLIND. He's been reading his braille Bible every day for the last 30 years so he has it memorized and proceeds to recite it to the San Francisco guy so they can print it on the ancient printing press they have put in working condition. Then Eli dies. His purpose has been fulfilled.

Hallelujah, it's over! We can go to PF Changs. I need a fucking drink after watching Denzel decapitate all those cannibalistic losers. My favorite part of the movie and the only thing that kept me interested was that even though these people were bartering with fucking KFC wet naps and travel size shampoos for clean drinking water they ALL had the coolest g*damn sunglasses!! The sunglasses were never lost nor broken throughout the entire movie. It was amazing.

To be clear, I was not opposed to the "message" I just didn't believe a word of it, the way it was presented. I thought the whole movie was slow and stupid. There was no nudity with all that violence. Hellllooooooo??!!

Save your money. Rent it and fall asleep half way through. When you have bad dreams don't blame me. I told ya so.

Why am I not Famous??!!

2010-01-09T22:09:00.007-05:00

It's really a shame my blog is not famous because I have so much to say. So few to listen. I honestly don't see that much difference in what I have to say and the bulk of all the other jackasses out there. Not that I am that profound or that funny, but who is?! Few. Not many.

I am going to add to my repertoire . . . movie reviews. If I make it to see a movie in the theatre I am often alone, which I LOVE. I remember thinking my mom was a total weirdo when she would go to the movies by herself. I get it now! I love it!! As a result, when I see a movie, I am totally engaged and my opinion is, at a minimum, insightful. On the other hand, if I watch a movie at home and make it through (in one sitting) it must be a winner and thus also deserves my review. Otherwise, I will give my half ass movie review, which is just as useful as it might save you an evening of mindless movie watching.

I'm thinking I should review movies in 5 words.

To wrap this dialouge up, I'm going to review the movie I saw today. Sherlock Holmes. In five words.

Robert Downey is Fucking Hot! Ok, let me try again. Awesome Actors, Engaging, Downey Amazing. Another 5 words. Thoughtful. Entertaining. Love. Robert. Downey.

Yes, I liked the movie.

Happy New Year - PM

2010-01-01T19:46:00.017-05:00

My belly and my heart are full as is my sink of dirty dishes. Streamers, empty beer bottles, soda cans, juice boxes, cookie crumbs, chips, and good thoughts for the New Year are scattered every which way. Sam has quite a contusion above his left eye from an awesome slap shot by Henry. Shoulda worn a helmet. I'm in bed with my laptop.

Believe it or not, I was not stressed one single bit all darn day!! I was perhaps irritated a bit this morning as I was chopping and chopping and chopping and certain little people were bothering the fuck out of me asking to be fed, blah blah blah but, all in all, it was a wonderful, stress free day!

I think I can honestly say it was the least stressful party I've ever thrown which just goes to show it's all in your attitude. I know what you're thinking and it has nothing to do with alcohol or medication. I am simply a whiz at entertaining!! WA LAA is my middle name!! The sitters were a godsend. They were proactive, take charge, amazing girls. When they would ask me a question I would say "Hellloooo, I'm in charge of the food and you're in charge of the kids, remember??" and off they would go. There were three of them. One was generally in charge of boys, one for the girls and the third was a floater. I really, really hated to see them go.

I know, I know, what you really want to know is HOW DID THE HAM TURN OUT??!! In a word. FUCKINGFANTASTIC!! Here's how it went down. . .

Garlic & Herb Rub: 1 cup fresh sage from 1 large bunch, packed lightly, 1/2 cup fresh parsley, 8 medium cloves of garlic, 1 tbsp kosher salt or 1 1/2 tsp table salt, 1/2 tbsp ground black pepper, 1/4 cup olive oil, mixed in food processor until forms a smooth paste. That is the recipe for a 6-8 lb ham so I doubled it. It was plenty.

7:15 am: Rubbed and ready to go in the oven!

Based on calculations I read online you should bake a fresh ham for 22 min/pound which, for a 17lb ham, comes out to 6 hours. I didn't think it would take that long, but it did. Luckily, I put it in at 7:15 am so it worked out about right. TA DAAAA!

1:15 pm

It actually looked MUCH more impressive in person. A gorgeous ham, if I do say so myself.

5:15 pm : notice the bottom of the pan is completely cold pig fat. YUM.

So, the "ham" really seemed like "pork" when it was all said and done. It wasn't pink like a traditional ham. It looked like "the other white meat". So, the question came up, "Is it a Ham or is it a Pork Roast?" All of the recipes I found were for "roasting a fresh ham." When I googled ham vs pork I found . . .

"Ham, technically is the thigh and rump of any animal that is slaughtered for meat, but the term is usually restricted to a cut of pork, the haunch of a pig or boar. Although it can be cooked and served fresh, most ham is cured in some fashion."

So, I think what I cooked was a 'fresh, uncured ham' although it could definitely just be called 'pork'. If someone were expecting 'ham' they quite possibly might have been disappointed. If they were simply open to fabulousness then they were happy. A few seemed genuinely confused.

The only thing lacking in this day was that I didn't get to share it in person with my few loyal readers!! I love you all!!!

Happy New Year - AM

2010-01-01T06:26:00.006-05:00

I went to bed at 10pm on New Year's Eve and woke up this morning at 6am so I could prepare THE HAM. And, yes, of course we are having black-eyed peas! Hoppin' John Stew. Ham stock base, Cajun seasoning, beans and rice. This is my favorite way to have black eyed peas except for the Texas Caviar mentioned by my Aunt Jennifer. I was going to make that too and forgot! Oh well.

This is the 17lb, skin on, fresh ham prior to cutting my beautiful, meditative diamond pattern.

This is after an hour of cutting with a serrated knife through the skin and fat, being careful not to cut into the meat. Does it look like it would be hard? Well, I hope so because it was a big fucking pain in the ass. I almost gave up half way through, chucked my $30 in the trash and called it a lesson learned. But, I didn't. I think I can, however, say with 100% certainty that I will never make a 17lb fresh ham again. If it's really good I might make a smaller one . . .

I put the ham in a brine of salt, brown sugar, garlic, bay leaves, and black peppercorns around 2pm yesterday and retrieved it at 6am this morning. It is now sitting for an hour at room temperature before I apply the Garlic and Herb Rub and then pop that motherfucker in the oven.

To be continued . . . .

Pre-Party Panic

2009-12-30T20:41:00.006-05:00

I'm having a New Year's Day party. There's no backing out now. I think Chad and I started our New Year's Day tradition 10 years ago?? That can't be right. But I think we started it Jan 1, 2000 which would make this year ten but our 11th celebration (someone check my math)!

Each year I seem to invite more and different people depending on where we live and who we're close with. Last year was our first New Year's Day in Sewickley and I have vague memories of inviting people (not tooo many, because I invited too many the year before and swore I wouldn't do that again) and then freaking out in my post Christmas funk, not wanting to cook one more thing, canceling, saying something about unforeseen circumstances......

So this year I decided to really have a Partaayy. I sent out an Evite to a shitload of people. What I didn't plan on was all the fucking kids associated with those adults!! We need to stop breeding. It's out of control. So now I'm panicking just a bit. My latest RSVP count is 48, 24 adults and 24 kids. Yeah, I know. What the fuck was I thinking. You should have seen Chad's face when I told him . . . yesterday. Not to mention 20 maybes, also equally divided.

AND, I've decided to try a new ham recipe! Brilliant, right? Instead of baking and glazing my tried and true ham I am going to roast a fresh ham! It is the biggest ham you have ever seen!! It's like a whole pig's leg or something. Poor piggie. They're as smart as three year olds, you know (new year's resolution!)

I calculated the roasting time based on what I could find online and it was 6 hours! Really??? The last thing I want is to overcook it. Well, maybe the last thing I want is to serve an underdone ham. The Partaayy starts at 1pm. What time do I put the ham in?? Better safe than sorry, right??

It will be fine. I'm counting on people coming and going between 1 and 4 and not staying the entire time. I bought a bunch of crafts today to keep kids (i.e. girls) busy and I have three sitters scheduled to help. I am going to keep the menu simple. Hoppin' John Stew, which I can cook the night before. Cornbread muffins. THE HAM. Spinach Dip. Pizza for kids.

The funniest thing really is seeing Sam & Henry's reaction to my panic. I made a list of all the kids broken out between boys, girls and babies. They just laughed and laughed when they saw how many adults AND kids (boys) were coming. They are now even calling in The Partaayy. Chad is just worried. The boys find it amusing. I am now somewhere in between. My goal is to enjoy myself! I think everything will fall into place after that.

Kick-Ass: Hit Girl Trailer

2009-12-22T17:37:00.001-05:00

I want to be her when I grow up!

Lucy & Grandma Ann

2009-12-20T12:12:00.004-05:00

My Aunt Jennifer's comment about Lucy's resemblance to my Grandma Ann made me want to go find a picture and compare. Here they are. I think it's the eyes and the cheeks.

Sparkle Sponge

2009-12-20T11:51:00.004-05:00

This may not be the most absorbent sponge I've ever used but it's the only one that actually makes me want to clean. I just love it! It sits next to my kitchen sink just begging to be picked up and used to make my kitchen sparkle!

I bought a butt load of them so I will never run out and will always have a clean one! The picture does not do it justice. It is much sparklier in person. Kind of like yours truly.

First Snow

2009-12-19T07:37:00.006-05:00

It's fucking freezing outside. Literally. I'm grumpy because Lucy was up at 6am for the third day in a row. I know someday I'll be able to sleep in as long as I want and instead I'll be getting up at 5am like Yaya. But today it's Saturday and I'd rather be in bed.

Despite my grumpiness, I have to admit it's lovely to wake up to our first snowfall. Too sweet to see the excitment on Lucy's face. Somewhat annoying that she wants to go make snow angels before it's fully light outside. Even more annoying that she wants me to go out too and keeps opening the g*damn door to ask.

Maybe Yaya's bah humbug attitude is catching. I don't feel like wrapping. I don't feel like cooking a big Christmas dinner. I don't feel like roasting chestnuts over an open fire. I don't feel like cleaning up dog shit which will surely appear because they dont want to go out in the snow. I do feel like getting the hell out of here and going shopping and perhaps getting snowed in while I'm at Target. Hmmmmmmm . . . .

Babies

2009-12-18T07:27:00.000-05:00

Check this out. Looks so cute and a great topic for discussion . . .

Cookie Exchange

2009-12-14T08:54:00.000-05:00

And the winner is . . . . me, of course! I am the self proclaimed winner of this year's cookie exchange.

Here's the recipe for Sarah's Famous Salted Dark Chocolate Caramel Cookies:

Ingredients:
1 cup unsalted butter, softened
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
3 teaspoons vanilla bean paste (3 tsp of vanilla extract can also be used)
2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup dark cocoa powder such as Hershey's Special Dark

note: regular cocoa could also be used but then they would no longer be Sarah's Famous Dark Chocolate Caramel Cookies they would be your 'regular ol' I'm too lazy to go to the store and get dark cocoa cookies'.
2 tablespoons sugar mixed with 2 tablespoons sea salt
48 chocolate covered caramel candies such as ROLO

Directions:
Beat butter until creamy. Gradually beat in white sugar and brown sugar. Beat in eggs and vanilla bean paste. Combine flour, baking soda, salt and cocoa. Gradually add to butter mixture, beating well. Cover and chill at least 2 hrs.

Preheat over to 375 degrees

Divide dough into 4 equal parts. Work with one part at a time, leaving the remainder in the refrigerator until needed. Divide each part into 12 pieces. Press each piece of dough around ROLO and roll into a ball. Dip the tops gently in the sugar/sea salt mixture. Place sugar/salt side up, 2 inches apart on greased baking sheets.

Bake for 8 minutes in preheated oven, rotating pan halfway at 4 minutes. When you take them from the oven there may be a lump from the ROLO. If so, gently tap it down with the back of a spoon. Let cool on baking sheet for at least 4 minutes, preferably longer, so the carmel doesn't come out of the bottom! If you do notice caramel coming out of the bottom when you take them off of the cookie sheet just flip them over, pat the caramel down and let them finish cooling upide down.

NOTES: I used vanilla bean paste but I think it may have been been a waste. The paste might be better suited to a vanilla cookie where you get to appreciate the specs of vanilla bean.

Also, I don't know how many dozen it took me to figure this out but the cookies baked on a dark, non-stick Air Bake cookie sheet came out much better than the ones cooked on a light, non-stick Wilton air bake cookie sheet. The majority of the cookies cooked on the light pan had the caramel come through the bottom. It was fine once cooled but not as pretty. The majority of cookies cooked on the dark pan did not have the caramel come through the bottom. Any ideas on why???

Lucy's Self Portrait

2009-11-18T11:10:00.004-05:00

This is the picture Lucy brought home from school yesterday . . .

Layered Greek Dip Recipe

2009-11-12T12:59:00.001-05:00

This recipe is from Better Homes & Gardens. I've had it several times and it's awesome!

Ingredients
1 8-oz. pkg. cream cheese, softened
1 Tbsp. lemon juice
1 tsp. dried Italian seasoning
3 cloves garlic, minced
1-1/2 cups prepared hummus
1 cup chopped cucumber
1 cup chopped tomato
1/2 cup chopped pitted Kalamata olives
1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese
1/3 cup sliced green onions
Pita chips and/or multigrain tortilla chips

Directions
1. In medium mixing bowl beat cream cheese, lemon juice, Italian seasoning, and garlic with electric mixer on medium speed until smooth and combined.

2. Spread cream cheese mixture into a deep 9-inch pie plate, or shallow serving dish. Evenly spread hummus on cream cheese layer. Top with cucumber, tomato, olives, feta cheese, and green onions. Cover and refrigerate 2 to 24 hours. Serve with pita chips and/or multigrain tortilla chips. Makes about 2-1/2 cups dip (16 servings).

Route 66 Countdown: 13 days

2009-11-09T10:14:00.003-05:00

I can't believe I'll be in Oklahoma in 11 days! I can't wait to see everyone!

Yesterday, in training, I ran/walked 9 miles. I'm pretty sure I jogged at least as much as I walked if not more which I was not even planning on doing so I was super psyched about that. I averaged less than 15 min/mile which was my goal so that was good also. Not super speedy but we all have to start somewhere.

I had lunch with my dear friend Jennifer yesterday and she reminded me that the Pittsburgh Marathon is in May so today I signed up for the half marathon! I am quite confident that I can run it! I'm so happy to have a new goal to focus on and work towards so I don't stop after all this training.

Who wants to join me in Pittsburgh on May 2, 2010???

http://www.pittsburghmarathon.com/

Fire Pit

2009-11-04T10:42:00.000-05:00

I love Fall. My favorite season.

Right now there are leaves everywhere. Men and their leaf blowers cannot keep up. I wish they would just take a break and leave the leaves where there are for awhile. I love shuffling down the sidewalk through newly fallen leaves. I love watching the leaves fall as I walk the dogs. I love that the dogs are mostly quiet as we walk and I can escape the constant chatter and banter of my house. I think my absolute favorite smell might just be a wood burning fire from some unknown location as I breathe in cool fall air.

I have been begging for a fire pit all summer and now that most of our outdoor projects are finished we finally have one! It sits upon a small stone patio that was added when our retaining wall (pictures of that later) was being put in. And that is our new fence which replaced the one that was literally falling down. If you look closely you'll see that there are two mini Adirondack chairs that match the big ones.

Our marshmallow/hot dog roasting sticks arrived yesterday from amazon so we broke in the pit last night with s'mores and hot dogs. Kids love roasting anything and I love a fire. Doesn't get much better than that. Except, of course, if YOU were here : )

Route 66 Countdown: 20 days

2009-11-02T07:14:00.005-05:00

It's early so I'm saying this out loud now while I'm feeling motivated. I'm going to give up alcohol and crappy food for the next 20 days in preparation for the half-marathon (and Thanksgiving). I think I will feel prepared and a little lighter for the walk. It would also be nice to lose some chub chub before Thanksgiving, cookie exchanges, holiday parties, etc. etc.

I am quite sore today after my long walk yesterday. Some stretching and light exercise today should do the trick though.

No school today or tomorrow. School conferences. Have no idea what the day will bring.

Route 66 Countdown: 21 days

2009-11-01T16:40:00.009-05:00

Today my goal was to take a fairly strenuous 2.5 hour walk. I wasn't as concerned with my distance but wanted to incorporate big hills and go for at least 2.5 hours. I did it, actually walking for 3 hours. And I didn't chicken out on any of the hills. I had new kicks I was breaking in and could tell they were much better than my old shoes. I felt pretty good when I was done. My hips and lower back were sore. I just wanted to sit and stretch.

But, just as I got home it was time to take Henry to hockey and Chad was busy working on the house and yard so I took him. After getting him on the ice I had to return the boys' football equipment for the season. Then I picked Henry up, getting home just in time to take Sam to hockey. Chad was still working hard so back to hockey I went.

Sam was practicing as goalie today which he was SUPER excited about. He wanted to get there early because goalie equipment is different than what we're used to. We have to put goalie pads on at the rink as opposed to at home with normal hockey pads. For goalie leg pads he lays the pads on the floor and then lays on top of them, belly to the floor, while I strap him in. The first time I did this we didn't realize we had to put the skates on first (they go on last with regular pads) so we had to unstrap and start over. Today, after he was all strapped in he stood up and the coach told me I had them on the wrong legs! Start over! Oh well, I think now we've made all the newbie mistakes and know what we're doing. At least as far as getting dressed.

We made it home about 4pm and I finally took off my running shoes. One blister. I unloaded and loaded the dishwasher and here I am. Wiped Out.

While I'm typing, Lucy is in the next room flitting around to her Barbie and the Diamond Castle movie. She is such a girl. Earlier, however, she was determined to put those goalie pads on herself. No one would help her but she was trying her darnedest. She would not take no for an answer. Just about the cutest thing. I love that these boys have a little sister and I love that she has two older brothers. She will be so much tougher and they will be just a little softer.

UPDATE: Obviously, I was really tired and wiped out tonight. So was Chad. After talking to him I found out he moved the equivalent of 3 tons of tile and stone today. Yep. 3 tons. Among many other things. I think that trumps my 10 miles. He consistently amazes me.

The Holiday Season is Upon Us

2009-11-01T07:08:00.005-05:00

November 1 marks the beginning of the Holiday Season in my mind. I'm planning a Cookie Exchange party. Thanksgiving is right around the corner. All of the stores are putting their Christmas stuff out. I need to get a picture of the kids this month for our Christmas card. Every year that seems to get harder and harder. It shouldn't be that hard. They're so super cute. I'll try bribing them with Halloween candy. It's a little early for the "Don't make me call Santa" line.

Can someone come up with a way to keep coffee in a coffee cup hot for a long time? I usually drink my coffee out of a thermal mug which does the trick but this morning they were all dirty so I'm drinking out of one of my cute coffee mugs. I forgot how much more enjoyable it is to sip from a mug. It just doesn't stay hot. And I don't want some "special stay hot mug" because I like my own. What about some type of hot stone or something???

I'm walking for two and a half hours today in training for walking the half marathon (which is in 21 days!). Yikes!! I hope that gets me to 9 miles but I'm adding some killer hills today. In any case, it will be a good workout. I'm going to have to get serious during the next three weeks. You too, mom. Jessica is going to kick our butt.

Daylight Savings Time is Great

2009-10-31T18:33:00.011-04:00

Damn does this feel like an extra long day. And it's not really. Tomorrow is. Daylight savings time. It's only 6:30pm on Saturday night. Halloween night. Not in this house though. We've already trick or treated and paraded until our masks and hats fell off and we made ourselves sick on Reese's peanut butter cups and an endless supply of lollipops.

Chad pointed out that daylight savings time is great because we get an extra hour of sleep. I guess I'm a wine glass half empty kind of girl. That may be the case if you don't have fucking kids that wake up at the same time no matter what. An extra hour of sleep? Nooooooooo. 7:30am becomes 6:30am which in turn becomes an extra hour of "Can I have something from my Halloween bag?" I hate Halloween.

When they were really little I could easily throw away the bulk of the candy and noone was the wiser. Now the little fuckers have everything sorted and cataloged like it's the end of the world.

Oh well, I have at least got them programmed to give me all of the Reese's peanut butter cups and peanut M&Ms. They know what's good for them.

Sunday morning update: 6:30am wake up became 5:30am. When I whispered to Lucy that it was a great day because it was daylight savings time and we get an extra hour of sleep she replied, "Remember when I threw up but I didn't throw up on Bunny??!!"

She was right. That was a great day.

Halloween is Great

2009-10-30T20:34:00.003-04:00

Ok, so I really do love Halloween. I love both kids and adults dressing up. I love decorating my house inside and out. I love all the fun themed food. I love scaring the shit out of little people.

You know what I don't like. Parades. I hate parades. For ALL holidays. But if I have to endure one holiday parade it would be a Halloween one. I parked way far away from the elementary school carrying way too many cookies and a large camera. I stood for way too long to watch kindergarten through fifth grade parade their costumes. Really cute. Blah blah blah. Class parties with jacked up little people high on sugar. Great fun. Then I moved on to a preschool Halloween parade. Cuter. Shorter. The people and the parade.

Then I drove around town and saw the signs for the town parade tomorrow at 10:30am. I have done everything I can to discourage my children from marching in yet another inane parade. I shall bribe them with Halloween candy, television and toys. Whatever it takes. I will only pull out the "mommy is about to stick her head in the oven" at the very last minute.

Farewell Piggies

2009-10-26T21:25:00.004-04:00

Yesterday, Lucy and I returned our three guinea pigs to Guinea Pig Rescue. I have been planting seeds in their little minds (Sam, Henry & Lucy's) for awhile to get them to agree to getting rid of the pigs. Pretty much any toy they desired was theirs for the asking. I was so tired of cleaning up guinea pig shit and urine soaked pine bedding. The ammonia stench after a few days was awful. And the pigs were in the laundry room so every time I walked up the stairs I felt the call of the laundry AND heard "wheeking" from the pigs who were standing up and waiting for me to make them happy. And they were easy to make happy. They wanted food and a clean cage. If it were only so easy to make every one else who needed me as happy. Unfortunately, or fortunately, everyone else won.

When I returned the guinea pigs I told Julene that she was a very special person to take care of all of these guinea pigs. She told me that she was the lucky one and that they were her therapy. Everyone has their thing. I love to care for and nurture the people and animals I love but there is a limit and I guess guinea pigs were my limit. I'm glad someone like Julene knows that caring for guinea pigs is her purpose. I'm actually not sure what my purpose is yet. At least she knows what hers is.

Progressive Dinner

2009-10-25T11:29:00.006-04:00

Last night was the annual Progressive Dinner for a group I belong to. There were 100+ people attending. Everyone showed up at one Appetizer House for drinks and apps and then names were randomly drawn at 7pm for Dinner House assignments. Houses hosted between 8-14 people. I hosted an Entree House for 12 people. I spent all day prepping and cleaning. Thank goodness for Sherry who did the bulk of the cleaning while I got rid of my piles and got the food ready. Our house looked great! !

Aside from holidays, I've never made dinner for 12 people, much less people I don't know. It was different. Fun though. And I did end up knowing about half the people. The food turned out really well so I thought I'd share my menu. I wish I had taken pictures of everything but it was a little chaotic.

Roasted Pear and Roasted Beet Salad with Blue Cheese and red wine vinaigrette

What a pretty and interesting salad this was! I absolutely love roasted beets for their flavor and color. I roasted the beets earlier in the day. Pear slices were tossed in butter and sugar and roasted for about 20 minutes right before assembling the salad so they were still warm. I thought the pears were kind of a pain to roast but everyone seemed to really like the salad.

No Peek Chicken
Grease a big casserole dish

Mix together:
1 box Uncle Ben's Wild Rice w/seasoning packet
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 can cream of celery soup
1 can cold water

Put mixture in casserole dish and top with bone-in, skin on chicken pieces
(I used all chicken breasts , 6 per casserole dish , which was tight because the breasts were enormous)

Sprinkle top of chicken with a packet of Lipton Onion soup mix and then seal tightly with foil and bake at 350 for 2.5 hours. No peeking!!

Although not part of the recipe I decided to soak the chicken in a brine for about 3 hours before assembling the casserole. I don't know how much of a difference it made since I hadn't made this dish before but the chicken was very flavorful and moist. The rice was really good too. Kind of like a wild rice risotto.

For the Brine:
Dissolve 1.5 cups sugar and 1.5 cups salt in a gallon of cold water. I used a big stock pot. Stir in 2 medium heads garlic, outer papery skins removed, cloves separated, unpeeled and crushed. Crumble in 6 bay leaves. Immerse chicken and refrigerate until fully seasoned. It smelled so good before even cooking it!!

While everyone was eating their salads I roasted asparagus, tossed in olive oil, salt & pepper, in a 400 degree oven. About 10 minutes. I finished it with fresh lemon juice before serving.

I also served warmed fresh garlic bread and fresh potato rosemary bread. And lots of wine, of course. So good!!

Easy peasy lemon squeezy as Sam would say!

My girlfriend, Kim, who was in charge of organizing the whole event and her husband were at my house because she and I were "co-hosting". Our boys all play hockey together. Another girlfriend was stag so Kim made sure she ended up at my house too since she was in charge of "randomly" choosing the names. My dining table only seats 8 so we three girls ate in the kitchen which was actually really nice because I didn't feel like I had to "entertain" anyone.

Everyone was kicked out at 9:30 so they could head to the Dessert portion of the night. It was held at this awesome barn that is perfect for parties. Cool things on the walls, couches, huge flat screen TV with the Penguins game on, a band, a little side room where people were smoking cigars. Dessert and more wine. I went for about an hour. I was pooped. Good times.

Obama Speech Update

2009-09-04T21:04:00.002-04:00

For those who don't get it, the basic issue is that many feel Obama is using the opportunity (the school address) to promote a political agenda and is overstepping the boundaries of federal involvement in schools. The suggested material teachers were encouraged to use in conjunction with the speech was objectionable. Cultish. Fucked UUUUUUPPPPP! Yep.

I think the school district had quite an onslaught of emails regarding the airing of Obama's speech in school, probably for and against. I wish I could have seen how many and what people were saying. To be a fly. Why on earth Obama would think it was ok to give a speech to our children in school without any parental presence, participation or approval is beyond me. Way fucking beyond. He's an arrogant son of a bitch.

Anyway, our school district decided that K thru 3rd grade would not view the speech in school at all. Someone will record the speech on Tuesday and the 4th and 5th graders will have the opportunity to view the speech on Wednesday at school. If parents do not want their children to see it (having had the opportunity themselves to view it on Tuesday) they are to send a note and an alternate activity will be available.

I have friends with middle school children and these students will have the opportunity to view the speech live on Tuesday. If parents do not want their childrent to view the speech they may send in a note and an alternate activity will be provided. Neither the elementary nor middle school will use any of the lesson plans or other suggested material found on the internet.

I will record the speech and view it with my children on Tuesday evening. I don't expect it will be a big deal at all but I am glad they are watching it at home and not in the company of a bunch of liberal teachers : )

Obama Land

2009-09-03T21:29:00.004-04:00

Ewwwww. I am so creeped out by Obama's (apparently long planned but I'm just now hearing about it) speech to our children on September 8th. I have not gotten a straight answer from the school yet about whether or not it will be shown in our classrooms but the vague responses I have received are leaning toward YES.

I will absolutely not, not, NOT be sending my children to school to listen to Obama's bullshit socialist propaganda. It is more than disturbing. Chilling. Nauseating. If I had more time I would look up more words in the online thesaurus.

And don't any of you liberals comment unless you can back up your shit. This is NOT just about telling our kids to work hard and get a good education. We don't need lesson plans from Obama for that. How 'bout after his speech we teach the kids a lesson on socialism by taking all the kid's who worked really hard to get A's and redistribute the good grades to all the kids who don't give a shit.

Hmmmmmm . . . how motivated will our children be to work hard now?

I am so ready to move to Costa fucking Rica.

Decoupage Project

2009-09-02T16:45:00.004-04:00

This is my decoupage project that lasted all summer. Not because it was difficult but because I am either lazy and/or have ADD. These are paper mache letters, purchased at Jo Anne's, that I covered in tissue paper. I may do DRINK and BE MERRY in different sizes, some covered in tissue paper, others covered in fabric. As you can see, EAT is placed above the mantle in my dining room. The pictures are not great but you get the idea.

Henry asked why the A wasn't pretty.

2009-08-15T18:04:00.001-04:00

2009-08-05T09:14:00.001-04:00

Go Kendra

2009-08-03T22:15:00.005-04:00

Ok, so given the choice, I would have named the guinea pigs Kendra, Bridget and Holly from The Girls Next Door show on E!. That was a great show!

Since that show ended I have been watching Kendra, one of the spin offs.

Tonight, I got totally caught up in watching Kendra and Hank's wedding. They truly love each other and it was just sooooooo sweet. Not to mention she is only the second person to be married at the Playboy Mansion. The first being Hef, of course. That's fucking huge!!!

I have so much more confidence in Hank and Kendra making it than I do Jill and Ed from the Bachelorette which is so so sad.

Guinea Pig Rescue

2009-08-03T10:10:00.020-04:00

Who knew such a thing existed? And who knew I was such a sucker. Ok, well we all knew that. As if I didn't need more shit to clean up. Oh, well. The kids are super excited and they are pretty darn cute and sweet. The kids and the pigs.

These are three bonded female guinea pigs we got from a Guinea Pig Rescue (i.e. lady with a BUNCH of fucking guinea pigs in her basement) yesterday. They were classroom pigs so are used to kids which is perfect! We renamed them with each child choosing a pig of their own and respective name.

Lucy and Ruby

Ruby is the smallest of the three and the mover and shaker of the bunch. She poops a whole whole whole hell of a lot.

Henry feeding Coco (Ruby is in the background)
Coco is my favorite. She is the chubbiest and definitely needs to lose a couple ounces. The lady we got them from said she thought she was the matriarch of the three. That's probably why she's the chubbiest; I think she's eating most of the food. She is the calmest of the three and makes the cutest little "happy sounds".

Henry really, really wanted to name her LaShawna but I put my foot down.

Sam and Buttercup

It was the funniest thing this morning when the kids were feeding the piggies red bell peppers and spring mix. Sam's pig had red pepper all over it's chin and was a mess - just like Sam! A perfect match. He came up with his name all by himself. "These things just pop in head! I don't know where they come from!" he said.

Coco

The Letter L

2009-07-31T09:02:00.013-04:00

My second 40-Day letter is the Letter L.

When I chose this letter I was intending to choose a Letter of the Day. To choose your Letter of the Day you hold the cards in the palm of your left hand, place your right hand on top of the deck, and close your eyes. As you exhale, ask the simple question, "What attitude do I need to bring into my day today to help me grow in spirit?"

I found the capital L so difficult and awkward to write I decided it really must be a 40-day letter and not just a Letter of the Day. After all, "The degree of mastering a stroke change is directly proportional to the value it will have in your life. The greater the difficulty, the greater the value."

My usual capital L is two straight lines. If I were writing a cursive L I would make a loop at the top and bottom. The reason to not make that top loop is that "you are reversing energy." I'm willing to give it a try even though I don't think it's as pretty.

"The Letter L reflects the amount of attention we give to our spiritual growth. If you are driven to explore your spiritual nature - what makes you tick beyond your personality - and how to develop that part of yourself, this is the letter to practice. Day after day as you write the Letter L, you may notice that you are more open and more receptive to spiritual seeking than in the past and that your thirst to learn spiritual truths has intensified. You may experience "waves of knowing" that take you deep inside, beyond your personality, and settle you gently into a sense of Oneness with everything that is. That is the essence of the Letter L."

One thing I found interesting this morning as I practiced the Letter L (on Day 6 of my practice) is that today is the first time it occurred to me to write "Lucy". On Day 3 of writing the Letter H I wrote "Henry" several times and enjoyed it. Although awkward, writing the Letter H is not as awkward as writing the Letter L. I usually enjoy writing a cursive "Lucy", just not yet with this different L. Time will tell.

Day 1 - Letter L

Day 6 - Letter L

The Letter H

2009-07-30T08:11:00.009-04:00

My first 40 day letter is H. The letter H emits one of the most powerfully propelling energies in the entire alphabet.

Each Alphabet card shows the letter's Soul Quality on one side.

Vimala says if you practice the letter H daily and draw into your life as many of its aspects as you possibly can, get ready for the adventure of your life. The Letter H not only moves you forward, it invites you to learn necessary lessons from the blind alleys you encounter along the way and guides you through them with dynamic, not-for-sissies energy. If you want to put firm footing on your intended life path, this is the letter to adopt. Vimala has practiced this letter daily for more than 30 years!

The letter's Declaration of Intent is on the other side:

I love this Declaration!

I live my life path with the zeal of an evangelist and the wide-eyed innocence of a child.

I knew this was an important letter from listening to the CD but I chose it randomly from the deck (although I don't believe it was really random).

Each day, for each 40-Day letter and Letter of the Day, I write and say the Declaration, write the Soul Quality and then at least three lines, upper and lower case, of the letter. I fill the rest of the page with words than include the letter or thoughts about how to bring the particular qualities into my life that day.

Crucial points for the program: Write on unlined paper. Lines reflect "Stay in the box and play it safe" thinking. The paper is to be positioned in the landscape direction. The portrait direction is common; my dreams are not!

Day Three of Handwriting

2009-07-28T21:58:00.008-04:00

I really like my handwriting and have never had a desire to change it. I do, however, have plenty of negative behavior patterns I would love to transform and this system seems to be speaking to me right now.

The first thing the program suggests is to write a page in your journal and then listen to the CDs. Vimala starts off by talking about the slant of your writing - left, vertical or right. I was feeling all proud because I am a vertical writer which "is ideal because it gives you a 360-degree view of what's going on.... encourages you to be the impartial observer". Then she goes on to talk about printing vs cursive. No printing, she says. WTF? I'm a printer. I love to print. It's so nice and neat. She says printers have usually been "betrayed" at some point. Printing is like putting up a wall. Hmmmmm. Very interesting. That was almost enough for me to say "fuck you" to the program. Cursive is stupid.

However, I am such a sucker for finding out more about myself. This is a challenge I can accept right now.

Vimala believes "each letter is not a mere shape, but rather a living entity, fully alive with aspects that serve as powerful cheerleaders in your day-to-day spiritual growth. As you implement the tools provided in this program to change your handwriting, you will gain a refreshing awareness of who you are, why you are here, and how to create - and step into - a life you love."

I do already LOVE, love, LoVe my life but there are definitely things I would like to change personally. I want to live more authentically. I want to live from a place of spirit and not ego. I want to live in the moment. I want take full responsibility for my choices and be proud of them.

The program speaks of The Five Noble Truths of Integral Handwriting. The one that really spoke to me was that "the degree of difficulty in mastering a stroke change is directly proportional to the value it will have in your life. The greater the difficulty, the greater the value."

That "Truth" helped me choose my "40 day letter" which was an unexpected choice. I think I'll talk about that in the next post.

Transform Your Life Through Handwriting

2009-07-17T19:10:00.008-04:00

OK, so I have been a member of the One Spirit book club for a couple of years. There are "featured selections" each month that if you don't decline will be automatically sent to you. In general, I have been very good at declining the monthly selections. The handful of times I have forgotten to decline and received a surprise book in the mail I have believed it was "meant" to come my way.

I don't remember the last time I forgot to decline but, recently, a surprise package was delivered. My first instinct was, "Oh Crap!" But then I got excited because I remembered that in the past something very appropriate has appeared at just the right moment.

The book: Transform Your Life Through Handwriting by Vimala Rodgers. It includes: 2 CDs, Guidebook, blank journal and 26 alphabet cards.

I'm not sure I can explain it succinctly but, in a nutshell, you practice one letter for 40 days plus a "letter of the day". The focus of the book is "to guide persons in adopting handwriting patterns that bring out the best in themselves, with a specific emphasis on the transformational power of the letters of the Alphabet." (Imagine spooky music)

Vimala says that writing patterns are a graphic image of how your subconscious mind interprets the world and your place in it. As you adopt new letter shapes, you are telling your mind how to think and the subconscious may not be pleased!

She goes on to say, "Your handwriting is an intimate portrait of how you see yourself - a graphic representation of collective memories programmed by your subconscious mind from birth onward, reflecting both your strong points and those that have put a screeching halt to your inborn creativity. . . As you adopt self-affirming writing patterns, you are discarding outdated thought habits and acknowledging your authentic self at the highest possible level."

So I'm game! I listened to the first CD last night. This morning I got up at 6am while my minions were still snoozing. I chose 2 letters to practice for 40 days (she said you could do that) and then I'll add a "letter of the day" each day. More to come on all of that and a short analysis of my own handwriting in the next post!

People Magazine

2009-07-14T13:46:00.006-04:00

Did you know that you can get a People magazine subscription MUCH cheaper if you subscribe as a business? I searched for the "cheapest subscription" and the lowest price I found was $116. However when I searched for a "professional" subscription I found it for $52 HERE!

It's not cheaper for other magazines, however. The few other mags I checked were cheaper ordered from the particular magazines' website. Interesting, no?

Speaking of People magazine, is anyone else tired of hearing about Michael Jackson and his fucked up life?

2009-07-11T10:18:00.001-04:00

Summer Vacation Quote of the Day

2009-06-10T20:39:00.002-04:00

Sam says to Mama, "You're cursing a lot today."

Quote of the Week

2009-06-07T18:10:00.003-04:00

One of Lucy's favorite things to say to me or anyone who will listen is, "Daddy doesn't know much."

The first time she said this to me was after a night of me being out and Chad putting her to bed. The next morning I asked her if she had fun with Daddy. She responded with "Yes. But Daddy doesn't know much." She was referring to our normal bedtime routine.

Then, in NC a couple of weeks ago she busted out with this same nugget of info to some random people she had been chatting up on the beach. They thought it was sooooo funny. It makes me smile because Chad is THE smartest, most capable, most ambitious, most driven (I could go on and on) person I know. Obviously, the standards in Lucy's world are a little different.

The funniest so far was when I came home a few days ago from somewhere and she waggled a piece of cheese in my face and said, "Daddy gave me circle cheese because HE DOESN'T KNOW MUCH". She knew I would have said NO to this snack because she had reached her dairy limit for the day. She was soooo pleased with herself.

Flying Pig Half Marathon

2009-06-07T07:46:00.005-04:00

The 12th Flying Pig Marathon is Sunday, May 2, 2010 6:30 a.m. in Cincinnati, OH.

I read about the 2009 event on the 37 Days blog and was inspired. I love that blog.

I have no interest (at this point) in running a half marathon but I would love to walk one. And I am going to do it. Registration is not open yet so I haven't officially signed up but I will.

Care to join me? Jessica & Juleah could run it together?? Mom? In any case, I am making a commitment to myself.

Penguin Fairy

2009-06-02T19:50:00.012-04:00

Lucy and I had an awesome day today. We went to Dick's in search of a Penguin's jersey her size. Success. "LET'S GO PENS!" Lucy yells everywhere she goes. Then we went to Borders where I bought yet another cupcake cookbook to help fuel my vision of being the premier cupcake designer in Sewickley. For Lucy we bought a Fairy Wing kit that you see pictured below.

Fairy Wing Kit $ 5.99
Super glue $ 3.50
Penguins Jersey $45.00
Cutest little Penguin fan EVER, flitting around in custom designed fairy wings - PRICELESS

Creeepy

2009-06-02T19:48:00.008-04:00

Lucy kept asking me to do a "googly eye" project with her. I kept saying . . . "later". She came up with her own.

Sunday

2009-05-31T21:04:00.002-04:00

I went to a 50's theme party last night with a group of women I've become friends with over the last 9 months. Our husbands all decided to stay home and watch the Penguins in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals. That's a very legitimate reason here in Pittsburgh. There were still mostly couples at the party but many a husband looked forlorn as they too wished they were home watching the game instead of dressed up in a gay 50's outfit their wife made them wear.

I looked pretty cute if I do say so myself. Rather than go into detail, I will hopefully get a picture to share soon.

Lucy was up early so I was a little foggy all day after my late night. Chad worked most of the day. Henry and his "Sharks" team got their sweet little butts pummelled at hockey today. It was so painful to watch. We may be the worst in the league and I think we played the best today. It is quite amazing how good these little guys are at hockey.

I took the kids to see Night at the Museum 2 this afternoon. That was equally painful to sit through. Lucy fell asleep in my lap which was sweet but not so much so after my arms and legs started to fall asleep.

I am now happily in bed watching Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Finals. We're tied at the moment. I was never interested in hockey until moving here but it is an intense, impressive game to watch.

4 more days until summer vacation.

Kiss

2009-05-28T21:41:00.002-04:00

My sweet Sam, 8 yrs old, told me tonight that he looked up "kiss" in the dictionary at school today. He giggled as he told me that it said "to touch lips" or something like that. It was so adorable that I almost couldn't even take it.

It Has Been Too Long!

2009-05-28T21:22:00.005-04:00

Oh my goodness, it has been a month since I last posted anything. Too long.

I think I stopped blogging right about the same time that I applied to several freelance writing websites. All of my applications were accepted. Since then I have written nothing. no freelance. no blogging. nothing. I think I thought that if I was writing it should be for money, or at least the hope of money.

The one freelance site I was most interested in required 10 articles within a certain time frame. I'm pretty sure I'm closing in on that deadline. That is typical behavior for me. I need to get writing.

A couple of days ago I started a food journal. Simple writing in a simple notebook with a pencil. There was something about that simple act of writing that made me realize how much I miss writing and how good it is for my soul. I honestly think I should be doing more physical writing and not just typing although I think they are both good for my soul. However, there is something especially rejuvenating about putting a pen to paper.

So, call me on it. I know I have about 3 loyal readers. Remind me that I love to write! Remind me that you love to read what I write : )

Photos

2009-04-29T20:23:00.003-04:00

For some reason I wasn't able to post the photos and comment on them in the same post.

I just love these photos. It is really hard to get a picture of Sam, much less a decent one. I love the expression on his face because it is totally him. I love that he let me take his picture which he never does. I even gave him a direction after one shot to raise his chin and he cooperated. I love that his skin is so perfect. He is getting so big and so old and so independent. It is heartbreakingly sweet to watch him with his little sister. On the other hand, watching him with his younger brother just makes you want to smack him up side the head. Having a little girl was so great for ALL of us.

Lucy is just gorgeous. I think. She is a willing subject. . . . for a little while. She just embraces life. I learn from her every day.

2009-04-28T21:31:00.001-04:00

1 in 4 women are Fucking Idiots

2009-04-01T21:35:00.006-04:00

According to Clear Blue, 1 in 4 women can misread a pregancy test. As a result, they've simplified it by actually displaying the words "pregnant" or "not". Apparently 1 line vs 2 lines was way too confusing. Thank you for the simplification.

Now, when I curse myself for not using the appropriate birth control and subsequently feel like an idiot it can be confirmed by the fact that I can purchase a test over the counter that is geared toward women being fucking idiots!!

So, I admit. I am an idiot. I thought family planning worked. Apparently it doesn't. Clear Blue has confirmed. I am an idiot.

Tuesday

2009-03-31T22:19:00.001-04:00

Give Me That Fish!!!

2009-03-30T18:12:00.002-04:00

I can't get this freaking song out of my head. I sing it all day long. And I just get better and better.

Hollywood Exposed

2009-03-24T22:16:00.002-04:00

Ok, so I was just going to get Botox and not talk about it. There are so many haters in my life. Jealous bitches. And I really just love to show up looking fabulous and pretend I don't hear the whispers as I enter the room.

It had been a while since I got it (the first time). I was nervous. I took a bunch of Advil to numb the pain. I neglected to remember that ibuprophen is a blood thinner so it makes you bruise easier. Dumbass.

Dr. Gonzales was the plastic surgeon administering the injections. I have to admit I felt special having a plastic surgeon paying attention to me but not suggesting I do anything more. Your tits are fabulous! How old are you? NO?! Really?

One of the first things he said was "It's like Rice Krispies, right?". I said, "Huh?" Apparently I missed that the first time around. He reminded me it sounds like Rice Krispies when you penetrate some particular layer of skin.

I squealed like a stuck pig after every injection. And, oddly enough, it did sound like Rice Krispies. Creeeeeepy. But cool. I love that kinda shit.

Another weird thing that I should probably not be sharing is the fact that I can wiggle my ears like crazy now. I have always had that particular talent. However, after exercising my brow muscles, as instructed, I found that since certain muscles were paralyzed others were working overtime. My ears. Sexy. No?

I Don't Want Your Suggestions

2009-03-24T22:04:00.002-04:00

I beg of you. Don't give me any suggestions. No, do. No, don't. For me, it's a big deal to listen to what other people think but ultimately listen to myself. Part of me is saying that this is all a bunch of bullshit so it doesn't matter. But it does. It is definitely an exercise in self expression and esteem.

Suggestions

2009-03-22T22:06:00.002-04:00

Searching for Sarah . . . . .

What Would Sarah Do? . . . After reading the What Would Tyler Durden Do? blog every day I am reluctant to to have this title although I like the concept. Don't all of my readers want to know??!! What would I do??

I would love to hear any suggestions . . . .

Layout and Title

2009-03-20T18:41:00.007-04:00

The current layout is actually the same as before with a different picture (that I plan on changing). I really liked the white picket fence pic with the chicken wire.. . . .

One avid follower suggested it might be time to change my title. I am open to suggestions although I am sort of attached to Disturbia.

My husband made a point the other day that makes me wonder if it applies to my blog also. I would ask him but he would probably distract me by telling me I'm cute thus making me forget what I was asking in the first place. He has a habit of doing that when he doesn't want to answer my questions. What was I saying? Oh yeah.

This is going to be a long drawn out boring way to make my point. which is not the least bit exciting. but here goes. . .

I have been wanting another tattoo for quite awhile now. Every time I ask my husband about one of my fabulous ideas he says, "I don't know if you're a 'tattoo on the neck' or a 'tattoo on the wrist' kind of girl" or a "blah blah blah kind of girl" or some shit like that. I usually just give a big sigh, smile and go back to my housewifely duties rather than repeatedly poke my fingers in his eyes.

So, after way too many of these same conversations, I asked ever so sweetly "Well, what the fuck kind of tattoo girl am I?? You just want to be the only cool one, don't you?! (he has lots of cool tattoos) " He finally gave me an explanation.

He said he thought I kept wanting these edgy tattoos that didn't go with my (not edgy) personality when getting a tattoo was edgy enough. That was actually the perfect analysis and explanation. He was totally right. Which was totally frustrating. He thinks I should get butterflies or flowers or some other girly shit.

My OTHER point is . . . I think my Disturbia title and pics are the edgy side of me that only really exists, if at all, in this blogging world. Thus I am reluctant to change it.

So whatddaya think??

Power 90: Day 2

2009-03-19T12:22:00.010-04:00

I would like to thank everyone who politely held their tongue while quietly laughing their ass off when I said I was going to do P90X. Upon doing some research (after making my impulse purchase) and listening to my body (it was screaming are you f@*%ng crazy?!) I have decided to do Power 90 (the precursor to P90X).

I started yesterday and I think it will be perfect for me. I'm a little sore today but still highly functional and motivated. I have a sick child today so I haven't done Day 2 workout yet. But I will.

I took a before picture which I will not be posting.

P.S. I know I keep changing my layout but tell me what you think. is it easier to read with a white background or the yellow or should I try something else.

Power 90 Update: Lucy was finally feeling better so I put her in front of Dora in the room next to me and started Day 2 (cardio). Of course, she came in to see what I was doing and exclaimed "Good Job, Mama!!" Then she proceded to get in my way and I almost kick boxed her into the next room.

The Day 2 Cardio was harder than the Day 1 Sculpting. I am so glad I didn't start off with that Extreme shit.

What about This?

2009-03-19T10:12:00.002-04:00

Searching for a new Look

2009-03-18T21:19:00.001-04:00

What do you think? Love it? Hate it? Indifferent?

New Season

2009-03-09T20:37:00.005-04:00

I'm feeling the end of a season, the beginning of a season, maybe boredom or perhaps my conscious . . . . whatever the fuck. I don't know.

My trashy shows are almost over. I've been checking out books from the library. I've been writing Haikus for goodness sake. Whatsa goin' on??!!

I have even committed with my sister-in-law to 'bring it' with P90X. I am the first person to jump on an exercise or nutrition bandwagon. I am also usually the first one to jump off the bandwagon. So, here I am, putting it out there. I ordered the DVDs and the chin up bar and I have committed to complete the 90 days of extreme workouts. I have yet to start the program but if I actually follow through I will be smokin' by summer. At a minimum, I can't look worse. Right??

In order to make this happen I will have to stop my nightly wine drinking and tv watching and actually get my big ass to bed and then up early in the morning. Just typing it is enough to make me realize it's a bad idea.

Alas. It's time to shit or get off the pot. Stay tuned.

Spring Haiku

2009-03-07T19:43:00.007-05:00

We have had such cold temps here in Pittsburgh and this weekend was our first glimpse of Spring. It was wonderful. While at the park I was inspired to write my first Haiku of the year.

Cloudy eyes confused
Fresh faces smiling all day
Pale shy skin peeks out

Little toes are bare
Feeling the grass and pavement
Squishing in the mud

Bubbles are blowing
Doors are open, flies are in
Dust off your scooter

Sarah's Quick Jambalya

2009-03-06T19:26:00.008-05:00

This is my shortcut recipe to jambalya. It can be ready in thirty minutes and it always gets rave reviews. My one official follower, DC Taste, is a chef in DC so this is not for her but for all the rest of you looking for a quick and easy meal that is sure to please.

* 1 box Zatarains Jambalya mix (usually in the rice aisle at your grocery store) Follow the directions on the box to cook but use a little more water than it calls for (I use chicken stock instead of water because I like it extra salty)

* Add 1 can of diced tomatoes, any variety. No need to drain.

* Add 1 large can of chicken (bigger than your normal tuna can). It's right by the canned tuna. It's great for casseroles or dishes like this. No need to drain. I like my jambalaya a little saucy. Like me.

While the above is cooking, pan fry some spicy andouille sausage or hot links. You can find them by the hot dogs. I slice up about two links and saute it until its a little charred and then dump it in the jambalaya pot, grease and all.

Let it all cook the 25 min or so that it says on the box and you're done! It's delicious.

Other nice additions are a little sauteed celery or onions. Thawed frozen shrimp, sauteed in the sausage grease is good too.

It's great with cornbread. Get that going while you're waiting for the water/stock to boil. Chopped jalepenos or canned corn are great additions to a plain cornbread batter (these would need to be drained : )

American Idol Update

2009-03-04T21:45:00.003-05:00

It sucks.

I am still secretly wondering if they're going to bust out with the fact that it's really Special Olympics: American Idol Style. They might be testing us to see just how PC and nice people can be. It is the era of Obama, after all.

Rock of Love Bus Update

2009-03-03T20:12:00.019-05:00

The first season of Rock of Love was really good. I'm not sure why I'm still loyal to it because last season sucked and this season sucks. The girls have gotten increasingly trampy (hard to believe). I guess I just really really really want Bret to find love.

Brittanya. She's pretty much dumb and mute but she's still there because she has some sick tattoos.

This is Big John trying to reason with a very drunk girl named Kelsey. Just squint your eyes and picture me where Big John is and one of my kids in the place of Kelsey. It was pretty much the same conversation we have . . . crying, crying, crying then "Come oooooonnn, suck it up. What are you, a little bitch?" I really like those socks though. I wish I could pull off that look.

Taya(not her real name - wink, wink). She got the fabulous news while filming the show that she was named Penthouse Pet of the Year. On the last show there was a challenge where the girls had to show their moves on a stripper pole. Some girls, although they looked like strippers, fell flat. That shit is harder than it looks! Jaws dropped, however, when Taya stepped up. WTF, they whispered, I think . . . Taya . . . might have done . . . . this before!#@!? If you were watching the show you probably didn't notice their jaws dropping because of all those big titties. but trust me.

When I was trying to find a picture of Taya I, of course, ran across some nude pictures of her HERE. I stumbled across them. I did not look for them. But there they were so I took a peek. Her face looks much better in pictures than in real life (on TV). Her areolas are HUGE. It looked like a UFO landed on her boob. More disconcerting was her vagina. I didn't notice it at first but once I did I was quite taken aback. I've never really looked at other vaginas before, or my own for that matter. Hers looked like a little hairless gremlin. like it might jump out and snatch you up. never to return.

Just in case you aren't up on the show. . . why would you be? This is Bret. If you know me at all, you know I hated the '80s. It was an awful decade for me. I hate most '80s music. I was never a big fan of Poison. Bret is definitely not my type. Hair extensions, artificially plumped up lips and bandanas just don't do it for me. But he is funny and smart and entertaining and I am some how able to overlook the fact that he is a man whore.

Last year, after becoming a fan of the show, I went to a Poison concert with my Rock of Love girlfriends. We had the BEST time!! The girl second from the left was pregnant so she was our designated driver. Bonus! If you look closely you might be able to see that the pregnant girl is wearing a tank top that says "Bret's Baby" with a big down arrow. We got a big kick out of ourselves.

Michelle Obama's Portrait Unveiled

2009-02-27T21:19:00.002-05:00

First lady Michelle Obama's official portrait was released Friday by the White House, a month after her husband's came out. The first lady is wearing a black . . . . Oh wait, I just remembered. I don't give a shit.

Nip Tuck

2009-02-27T20:26:00.003-05:00

I have at least four Nip Tucks on my DVR. I'm catching up tonight. I used to be much more in love with the show. The subject matter is always over the top but it's somewhat lacking this season.

For instance, in the episode I just watched, the doctors (Sean & Christian) lamented the loss of their lesbian anesthesiologist who realized she was in love with Christian, the hetero sex addict plastic surgeon for whom she worked. Sean, Christian's partner, then found himself interviewing a hot, tattooed anesthesiologist that would only work for him if she could 'really be who she was'. He then proceeded to find out just who she was. Just in case you were wondering, she was a whore.

Meanwhile they had a yogi patient that wanted a penis reduction because he was obsessed with sucking his own dick. After hearing that, a celebrity client of theirs broke his own neck trying extra hard to suck his dick just as well. Yaawwwnn.

Christian, the sex addict plastic surgeon, was conflicted about whether or not to inject his infant granddaughter with Botox or Collagen so she could become a child model. In the meantime, it was made clear that many physicians do actually perform these procedures on toddlers. He chose the moral high ground and did not perform any procedures on his granddaughter. Thankfully, he did appropriately chastise the baby's porn star mother.

It may be time to examine why I'm attracted to all of these fucked up shows. How 'bout lets not and say I did. Deal?

ask the Answer Bitch!

2009-02-27T20:00:00.005-05:00

OMG. I just realized that some other bitch has my dream job. Yes, it's true. Apparently I am the under acheiver. Her blog is HERE. It's not even funny. And she has a new book out, The A-List Playbook, where she divulges dirty little secrets like . . . . skinny celebrities don't eat. no fucking shit? I bet the next secret she shares is that Britney and Jamie Lynn were scheduled to be implanted with birth control but something went terribly wrong; Pamela's tits are fake and Mickey Rourke is gay.

Woman's Face Ripped Off by Pet Chimp

2009-02-27T14:34:00.009-05:00

You've probably heard about this story. It's horrific. Watch the entire video just so you can get Sandra's whole story. The 911 call is especially disturbing.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

And by disturbing, I mean that the 911 operator was a freaking idiot. "What's wrong with your friend" . . "He's killing her" . . . "OK, what's the problem?". And then he was like, "Yeaahhh right, your chimpanzee is killing your friend." A touch condescending, doncha think?

Also, does it look like Travis has a diaper on? He can drive, use the computer and model but he can't figure out how to use a toilet? That seems a little suspicious to me.

Sandra has had a rough time. Her husband died 5 years ago then her daughter was killed in an auto accident and now her beloved chimpanzee/son ripped off the face of her best friend. That's some fucked up karma right there. What are the chances she hangs on much longer?

On a lighter note, she looks pretty good for 70. And quick on her feet too. I have a feeling she has laced tea with Xanax before, no?

P.S. I have since read that Travis could not only use the toilet but could drink from a wine glass. Now its sounding suspicious but in a totally different way.

You can't eat it, you can't fuck it and it won't get you into heaven

2009-02-23T20:38:00.010-05:00

That was Mickey Rourke's response to Bahbwa WaWa when she asked him what winning the Oscar would mean to him. (I'm just watching it tonight) OK, so now I love him. Mangled face, silver tooth, gay outfits and all. I feel bad for making fun of him and his chihuahua, Loki, who died after 18 years. His dogs truly kept him alive. And I totally understand that because if he had had children during that time in his life he definitely would have killed himself.

Hugh Jackman was voted 2008's sexiest man alive by People magazine. It was rumored he was gay even before I brought it up. I thought I was being original but hellooooo. . . . . his kids are ADOPTED!! OMG, gay gay gay gay. so cute. but gay. Just another example of the liberal mainstream media saying whatever the hell they want regardless of the truth. i.e. OBAMA. Media is talking out its butt about someone they know nothing about. Blah blah blah blah.

At least Mickey seems true to himself, you know? I have been identifying with various celebrities this week (not too much diff from other weeks). I admire Mickey for putting himself out there knowing people are going to make fun of him. He's not stupid; he knows what people are going to say: he obviously doesn't care. Again, I am reminded of myself. Why does everything remind me of myself???

It has been a big step for me to put my blog out there for anyone to read. Beyond my mother and my husband. There is just something about putting your shit out there and saying "here it is!". Don't like it? Oh, Well. Like it? Oh, well.

You can't put any more stock in people that like you versus people who don't. I think I am finally comfortable saying whatever I want and knowing that those who love me won't love me or leave me based on what I say in my blog. Everyone in my life is totally stuck with me by now.

Natalie Portman Rap

2009-02-22T20:10:00.010-05:00

Natalie Portman is a vegan, which I love. She's mostly all shy and quiet when she's interviewed, kind of like me. I wish I could pull off a short hair cut like that but I think I'd have to be much more petite not to look like a lesbian. I'm a little envious she got to do this rap video. Can't you just see me in her place? We're like peas in a pod, me and Natalie.

warning: this video is very crude. don't watch it if you have delicate sensibilities.

p.s. When I mentioned to my husband the subject of this blog he had this blank look when I made the comparison to Natalie and myself. Fuck him.

p.s.s. Love you honey : )

I was able to embed this video at first but now it's been disabled. So check it out HERE.

Live From the Red Carpet

2009-02-22T19:32:00.013-05:00

It's a good thing I ~~wasn't invited to any Oscar parties~~ turned down all those Oscar party invites. It affords me the opportunity to sit and watch, laptop at the ready, giving you my immediate reactions and observations. Otherwise, I would have been drinking and having fun and chatting. Now I'm just drinking. typing. drinking. typing. I've banished my children to the upper chambers and I'm enjoying a ~~bottle~~ glass of Jacobs Creek Reserve. Yes, that's right. Reserve. I usually drink the regular cheap cheap Jacobs Creek but tonight definitely calls for the Reserve.

If I don't publish my observations tonight then tomorrow they will seem (accurately so) completely irrelevant. So here goes.

Anne Hathaway is a true fashionista. I imagine I would be like her if I were 6 inches taller and an actress.

Mickey Rourke, 56, was still extremely disturbing. Although well spoken, he sported a Loki charm of his deceased 18 yr old chihuahua around his neck. My bad. I didn't realize he was gay.

You gotta love Sohpia Loren but it's time she stay home. She's not doing herself any favors.

Marisa Tomei, 43, is my idol. Nominated for best supporting actress for playing a stripper in The Wrestler, she is amazing. She didn't win the award but she won my heart.

Brad & Angie. Of course, I love them both but does she own any other style of dress?

Kate Winslet, The Reader, lovely as ever. I also imagine myself as her if I were a famous actress. She seems very 'real'.

Does anyone really like Beyonce's clothing line? I feel like it's a secret joke Hollywood is playing on us. One day we'll show up in those god awful outfits and everyone will scream "SUUUCKERRRR!"

Why is Jessica Beil at the Oscars. Did I miss something?

I love Robert Downey Jr. He looks amazing after all those yrs of hard living.

Josh Brolin and Diane Lane. It's like looking in a mirror. Me and Chad.

I thought Sarah Jessica left her troll of a husband. He's headed for Broadway. Heeellloooo. He's gay.

Taraji P Henson. supporting actress for Benjamin Button. Don't know who she is but she is so cute!

All of you Botox naysayers, did you notice how many of the stars have obviously had it?! Young, old and in between. So There! And I really don't want to hear anything about how I'm not a movie star so why am I comparing myself to them. Fuck you. That's what I say to that. I am a star in my own movie every g*damn day.

I thought Hugh Jackman was hot until he started dancing around like a fag. Disappointing.

WTF. I just noticed Mickey has a silver tooth. Every time he starts to redeem himself I'm struck by yet another fucked up thing about him. Disturbing. Who advises him?

Now I can't decide if I'd rather be Kate Winslet or Tina Fey.

When you watch these shows are you bored? Envious? Happy with exactly where you are in your life? Does it effect you a little, a lot, or not at all. I think I have been more apt to compare myself in my later years. When I was young it seemed like I still had a chance. But as everyone gets older it seems like something really unfair is going on. Nonetheless, I am comforted by the fact that I don't need/desire accolades from millions of people. I am quite happy with myself and my life.

The only thing I require is that my children do the "Hi Mom" thing when they are being interviewed after a game, play or recital.

I felt bad for Jen A up there. I can't imagine anything worse than standing before Brad and Angelina and their 50 kids. I think I would do the honorable thing and stab myself with my sword. Bravo to her for giving it an outstanding effort though.

Sank you, sank you, sank you belly much. Domo arigato. mista robato.

If you didn't get that then you weren't watching. But thanks for checking in. xo

25 Random Things About Me

2009-02-20T22:20:00.004-05:00

I'm not so sure about Facebook yet but apparently I have too much time on my hands so I participated in this . . . . I don't want to type it again here or even cut and paste it. So just check it out HERE if you are interested. I know you are.

p.s. I realized, after the fact, that you couldn't actually read the 25 ~~fabulous~~ random facts about me without logging in to Facebook and already being my 'friend'. Yet, there was no one who mentioned that so maybe you're not reading everything! ?#@ . Again, too much time on my hands. here it is.

1. I never went to kindergarten. That might explain why I don't always play well with others.

2. I love to drink wine.

3. I love to cook and collect cook books.

4. I love to hang out in book stores when I have nothing better to do. Or when I have lots better things to do.

5. I love reality television. They should put my shit on TV.

6. I love blue cheese more than anyone else on the planet. Really. I challenge you to prove me wrong.

7. My husband is from Oklahoma but we didn't date until after we had both moved to California and met up again. He is the love of my life.

8. I've been spending way too much time on Facebook lately; mainly because I'm avoiding housework. Not because I find you all fascinating.

9. I don't have to wash my hair every day. It looks fabulous for days!! At least that's what I tell myself. Plus, I look really cute in a ball cap.

10. I volunteered to get Botox at an event that was showcasing different cosmetic procedures. I looovvveeed it!! I look fucking fabulous!!

11. I have the cheapest and best cleaning lady EVER. She comes and cleans for 4 hours a week and I only have to pay her $50! Yes, she is a US citizen and speaks English!! Now you know why I can spend all this time of Facebook.

12. I am a foster parent to sick babies.

13. Just kidding. Just wanted to see if you're still paying attention.

14. I am surprisingly excited to go to my 20 yr high school reunion considering I was pretty depressed all those years.

15. I can never resist pizza. good pizza. mediocre pizza. shitty pizza. all pizza. it's a problem.

16. I kissed a girl ~~twice~~ once. and I liked it.

17. I leg pressed 260 lbs today.

18. I hate to get flowers on holidays and anniversaries. Too cliche.

19. I have a French Bulldog that snorts and farts all the time. I love it.

20. Lord have mercy. this is boring.

21. If anyone actually reads this whole list then you have to comment.

22. I love to swear.

23. I have the cutest, smartest children ever. I know everyone says that but, come on, that's just bullshit. I can't even stand half the kids I come into contact with.

24. I'm allergic to the sun. Seriously. And not in the same way I'm allergic to housework. I'm really allergic to the sun. It gives me hives.

25. I have no idea how I ended up with so many friends on Facebook. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

My Blog is Experiencing a Downturn

2009-02-19T20:18:00.007-05:00

This is just a warning, to those who give a shit, that my blog may be focusing (for a short time) more on the superficial than the spiritual. I am finding comfort in cursing and making fun of people. I'm not proud of it. I would not recommend it. But that's what I'm doing. Like it or not. Read it or don't.

I was really surprised when I did a little research and found that the movie 9 1/2 Weeks came out in 1986. Lord knows I feel old as it is, but I did not realize that I was only 15 yrs old when this movie came out. It made a BIG impression on me and my sexual development. If only in my mind. And, thankfully, my mind was the only thing that was active at that time.

So, here comes the disturbing part. Have you seen Mickey Rourke lately? He's nominated for an Oscar but he's a fucking mess. Holy Fuck is he hard to look at. That's it. I'm just disturbed. I can't believe I had fantasies about this man. It's just all fucked up.

Mystery Solved

2009-01-27T19:06:00.003-05:00

I know we've all said it . . . . what the hell could have happened to those f*#!ng socks?? Well, guess where we found these babies?

My dryer was taking about 3 times longer to dry clothes than it should so, on a hunch, I asked my dear husband to check out the vent thing that shoots all the dryer steam outside. Lo and behold, he stuck his hand in and pulled out SOCKS. They had been sucked out of the dryer into the vent thingy and it was all clogged up! Holy Crap!! Just imagine all those socks that have been sucked right out of the house and sent flying up to sock heaven. What happens to them? They could be picked up by a neighboring dog, a stray cat, a squirrel or some wandering, crazed housewife who has finally reached her limit with mismatched socks.

Personally, I have found some comfort in this. I am not crazy. There is a black hole and it's stealing my socks.

My Little Stars

2009-01-24T11:16:00.009-05:00

You are My Sunshine (Lucy, 2.8 yrs)

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Hank playing hockey. He's #25 ( 6.75 yrs)

Sam (8yrs) playing basketball. He's #8 in a purple shirt, pants w/white stripe.